Yeah

Go Steelers! Black & Golddust says so.

The Steelers Suck

Sorry for the mad amount of Youtubes lately. Work has been hitting me hard with all-day meetings, and I don't want you to leave PSaMP empty-handed. This is the best I can do with the time I've got.

You do remember that this week is our first AFC North divisional game. And its against the Gowns (I was gonna use Brownies or Clowns, but Gowns is highly underused and fits perfectly with their girlish nature). So I scanned Youtube to find the latest smack talk, and the newest thing is a video entitled "Pittsburgh Steelers Suck" (above). I figure it'll give us fans a little more motivation, so we don't rest on our Texans-game laurels. Hell, I do my best to keep the team motivated...why not the same with the fans?

I coulda just linked to the random Browns thing(?) peeing on a Steelers fire hydrant, or the Steelers dog humping the Browns stuffed animal, but this is the latest piece of bulletin board material.

Funny how all the Steelers Suck/Browns Rule videos on Youtube cleverly forget that the Steelers have won 9 straight against Cleveland and 16 of the last 19. Man, we suck so hard.

This Dude Sucks And Is Not A Steelers Fan

How do I even begin to insult this douchebag?

Uh...nice weak stream, asshole?

According to the Youtube description, the pee-er is a Steelers fan. At least in his own mind he is. Look:


Watch as I take a leak on my favorite jersey.


Favorite jersey? I don't care if this was a lost bet or some drunken mishap...you never pee on anything involving your favorite team/jersey. Drink your own pee before you pee on Steelers memorabilia.

The Marian Hossa shirt on fire? Acceptable, since he left the team for the Wings. Peeing on the jersey of the quarterback and team captain just days before the start of the regular season? Not forgivable. You've just been ostracized from Steelers Nation, jerk.

I'm Putting Peter King On Blast

You heard me. I'm calling out Peter King, and you can blame ESPN for it.

Now that your minds are completely blown, let me explain. I know King, Sports Illustrated's football guru, and ESPN have nothing in common other than a shared spot in the mainstream media, but there's reason for my rage. King is a fine writer in small doses, he's respected in the football community and my Monday Morning Chrysler New Yorker column (which will return at the start of the regular season) plays off the title of his Monday Morning Quarterback column. But I have to get pissed off for something that he wrote like two weeks ago, a blatant falsity that was reinforced by ESPN today.

I like to criticize the MSM here at PSaMP, but I'm a perfectly respectful person in everyday life. I'm no Smizik fan, and I've said so in as many words, but our conversation/interview was as cordial as possible. Now, back to King. In a recent column at SI, King had the following to say about Quarterbacks and the AFC North:


[I'm] not sure if the team with the best quarterback in the division is automatically favored. Carson Palmer's the best in the AFC North, and the Bengals are the third- or fourth-best team in that division.


Ah the old "Carson Palmer is an elite quarterback argument." I wrote to King, knowing full well that he gets more email than I could ever imagine, but my question was legit. Here it is in it's entirety:


Mr. King,

I have a question, if I may. It doesn't have to be included in any mailbag or anything, but a response would be greatly appreciated. In your most recent mailbag, you reference Carson Palmer as the top QB in the AFC North. Can I please ask what information you use to grade quarterbacks? As a Steelers fan and blogger, I...and I think I speak for a majority of Steelers fans...find myself scratching my head when Palmer is constantly alluded to as a better quarterback than Ben Roethlisberger. I could ask how many rings Palmer has won, or how many wins both QBs had in their respective rookie seasons, but those are somewhat topical and overused. Last season alone, however, Ben had 6 more touchdowns and 9 fewer interceptions than Palmer, all while posting the second best QB rating in the league behind Tom Brady. I'm sure I don't need to remind you, but Ben's rating was 104.1. Carson struggled to get to 86.7. Sure, Carson threw for more total yards, but yards do not equal wins, as seen in both teams' respective records. Ben managed to get his team into the playoffs via winning the division despite being sacked 30 more times than Palmer. There's no real reason to believe that Ben, his offensive weapons and O-Line won't all improve on last season, so why the love for Palmer? You aren't the first and certainly won't be the last writer to praise Palmer over his Steelers counterpart, but it's troubling to see the same trends over and over in today's sports media landscape. Palmer has done little more than prove to be a vertical passer who can easily rack up the yards, but his resume is dwarfed by that of Roethlisberger. I hope to hear from you soon, as this is something that never seems to have a legitimate answer, and Steelers fans deserve a break from this baffling misconception.

Yours in Big Ben,

Nicholas
psampmail@gmail.com
Editor and Sole Writer at Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies


Am I incorrect in any way? I laid out nothing but solid, known facts about the two QBs, and most everything seems to go against the winless-in-the-postseason Palmer.

So, I didn't get an email back, something I was completely prepared for. I was ready to forget all about it and let Ben prove himself...AGAIN...this season as Palmer's superior. But ESPN had to go and bring it up again. tWWL has team-by-team previews up today on their website. Here's the one for the Steelers. James Walker, a .com writer I've never heard of, brought up the same Palmer-lauding. Take a look at this bs:


Best offensive player: QB Ben Roethlisberger. Roethlisberger had 3,154 yards passing and 32 touchdowns in '07. He is close to joining the NFL's elite quarterbacks and could solidify his spot next to Tom Brady, Peyton Manning and Carson Palmer with an even bigger year in 2008.


Please, someone tell me how Carson Palmer is compared to Peyton and Tom? I'm no fan of Manning or Brady, but I respect what they've done in their careers. Hell, they both have rings. So does Big Ben. So does Trent Dilfer. And Brad Johnson. Palmer's hand is naked (a visual that made me throw up slightly). So Palmer can throw for a great number of yards when healthy...big deal. He can also throw an assload of interceptions. I guess I'm just happy fellow postseason-loser Tony Romo wasn't referenced by Walker.

So I'm calling you out, Peter King. Go ahead, Google your name and find this post. Or better yet, someone email this post to King on any of his contact sheets in his columns at SI. Steelers Nation deserves an answer.

Rankings Are Stupid

To make this perfectly clear...I hate rankings. Sure, when I was younger, I'd check out Power Rankings throughout the NFL season to see where "experts" felt the Steelers were at in comparison to other teams, but it's easy to grow cynical of said rankings when you begin to understand that they are just the opinions of some chump. I put my opinions on this page, but that doesn't mean you have to follow them and take them as Gospel truth. There's a comments section and my email address, and God knows I've been yelled at by many a reader through both. Most of 'em are clueless, but its nice to see that the entire population isn't made up of sheeple.

So I don't get worked up about lists and rankings like I did as a younger man. That is...until the past few days. The Steelers and their fans have not only been disrespected by several rank-ers, the reasoning behind the dickery is completely unfounded. Let us investigate...

Emailed to me by Cotter this weekend...Fox Sports decided to rank each NFL fan base. Don't get me wrong...I don't expect Pittsburgh to be ranked #1 in everything, but after awhile, it's pretty dumb to show love for certain teams/fans instead of those hailing from Pittsburgh. According to the losers at Fox Sports, the Steelers have the 6th best fan base in the NFL. Like I said, we don't always have to be #1...but 6? Let's look at the asinine explanation:


The "Stillers" fans are a very annoying bunch. If you ever encounter one and the subject of football comes up, all you'll hear about is how many rings they have. Whatever your argument is, they will counter with that. That being said, they have Heinz Field and sports bars around the country rocking on Sundays. They're very passionate about their football and it's completely understandable. Before Sidney Crosby, what else have they had to root for?


WHAT?!?!?! This is on a legit sports-media website? Man, I wouldn't expect to see this type of reasoning from the shittiest of the shitty sports blogs out there. And there's some shitty sports blogs out there. How about not generalizing all Steelers fans from one experience, and instead, ask some fans about their take. The rings are one thing, but we also boast a million HOFers, one of the most influential ownership families and fans who were displaced by the downfall of the steel industry that still show up for games, be they in Pittsburgh or Seattle. Keep our names out your mouth and do some research next time. And I guess the World Serieses and Stanley Cups meant nothing before Sid came to town. EPIC FAIL.

I'd begin my debate about Cleveland at #4 and Philly at #1, but I can feel an aneurysm coming on.

I found the other ranking while clicking through one of The Big Lead's Roundups from this weekend. Cold Hard Football Facts ranks the All-Time NFL Franchises. If I can use Fox Sports' generalization, our 5 rings should have the Steelers somewhere in the top 3, along with San Fran and Dallas. Plus, being the only team to win 4 Super Bowls in 6 years should give us some extra leverage. Nope. They have the Steelers at number 8, behind the Raiders, Redskins and Giants. THE GIANTS...you know, the team riding the emotion of their recent Super Bowl win. If they lose to the Patriots in that game, there's no way they sniff the top 8. Here's the Steelers reasoning:


To understand the Immaculate Reception's impact on the psyche of Steelers fans, it pays to remember that it was not only a miracle win, it was the first postseason victory in franchise history, a victory 40 years in the making. Then came the great draft class of 1974 (four Hall of Famers) and a first NFL championship immediately followed.

As the old advertisement used to say, "You've come a long way, baby."


VIRGINIA FREAKING SLIMS?!?!? If you smoke Virginia Slims in Pittsburgh, anyone within 5 feet is allowed to punch you. It's written in the city's laws somewhere. I'd look it up, but I'm still following the no-research attitude given to us by Fox Sports.

Again, we don't have to be #1, but 8? My buddy Cian, as seen in today's MPotD, called Pittsburgh "Contenders Forever." We regularly put out a good team and are the class of the AFC Central North. How in the hell do the Steelers get stuck behind perennial flakes like Washington, Oakland and New York? Sure, they've all bested the league at some point in their respective histories, but can you really get behind any of those teams year in and year out? Tell me one out of those three or Pittsburgh will have a deep playoff run every year and I'll pick Pittsburgh each time. But I guess I only do that because I'm "annoying."

So yeah, I'll probably forget about these rankings as soon as I hit "Publish," but I needed a place to vent. You don't have to agree with my opinion, because that's all it is...one man's take.




/my take is better than these two, though.

Blue Jays Fans Are Creative, Classy

Baseball fans are unique. And original.

Let's get specific, and single out some of our Canadian fan-brothers (if that's even a word). The last interleague series we played prior to the current Yankees series involved another AL East team, the Toronto Blue Jays. I'll forever respect the Jays solely for the Joe Carter home run to win the World Series. Their fans...not so much.

With Freddy Sanchez up to bat, these geniuses decide to give up on the name Freddy, and instead, use the term Dirty Sanchez (language NSFW).

Excuse me while I laugh for a few minutes.

"Ooooh, his first name ends in a Y and his last name is Sanchez. I wonder how we can make something hilarious out of this?"

It was funny the first time. It was funny the second time. Hell, it was funny the third. By now, though, I'm sick of losers thinking they're so damn original by chanting "Dir-ty San-chez."

And according to the Youtube page, these idiots were sitting right in front of Freddy's wife and two kids when they proved how hardass they were. Real classy, dicks. I hope Freddy shows up at their cubicles next week chanting, "Micro-managed, corporate-slaves making minimum wa-ge."

At least they coulda got creative and gone with some of these:

"Ilich Ramírez Sán-chez"

"Ros-elyn Sán-chez"

or even

"Matt San-chez"

Do some research next time, jerks.

Tony Gallagher Has A Beef With The Pens, Officiating, Kids On His Lawn

We're now in a new week, beyond the Penguins season and into some dumb hot weather. I guess the end of the playoffs segues into the start of a new season...Trash The Penguins Season.

My name is Tony Gallagher.

I write one-sentence paragraphs.

My view on the NHL sucks.

I like to complain about the Penguins.

My opinions mean nothing.

Seriously, read that link. Here it is again, in case you're an idiot.

For those of you not up to date on the Stanley Cup Finals...they're over. Detroit showed they were the better team and took the Cup with them. Empty Netters has an entire season recap posted. The Pensblog is about to write their own recap. Nothing that I, or any of those guys, say makes any difference in what happened in the Finals. We lost, Detroit won, let's move on to next season.

For Tony Gallagher, that isn't enough. He has the balls to question the officiating in the final minutes of Game 6:


While nobody really wanted to say so, how could you have possibly watched the calls in that series and not had the feeling that somehow, consciously or more likely unconsciously, there was a slant toward favouring the Pittsburgh Penguins?

While it seemed to be prevalent most of the series, at times to a far lesser extent, the final 20 seconds of Game 6 illustrated the problem perfectly.

With Detroit just having given up a power-play goal that allowed Pittsburgh to get to within 3-2 with under two minutes to go, the Pens had their goalie out and the Wings under siege.

But with about 18 seconds left, Pavel Datsyuk of the Wings managed to skate free with the puck, skate it out over the blue-line, but as he readied a shot toward the open net, he was hauled down with an abundantly obvious stick foul so blatant that Helen Keller would have been forced to raise her arm.

No call.

Pittsburgh then got the puck, stormed the other end and nearly tied the game in the last second.

This call wasn't missed. There is absolutely no conceivable way it could have been missed.

But the officials chose not to end the Penguins' season. In fact, for the first time in all my years of viewing hockey, I was overwhelmed by a sense that there existed a desperate need to keep this series going for the good of the game, no matter how far rule interpretations had to be stretched.


Um...wow! Not just for the completely ridiculous "argument," but for the fact that I had to copy/paste 8 paragraphs that should have been merged into one.

I find it hard to believe that an editor would allow this filth to be published. We, as bloggers, take so much heat for publishing vile, salacious crap while The National Post greenlights complete b.s. The Wings won the Cup, dumbass. And see, we aren't the only ones making Helen Keller jokes.

Let's look at the numbers. There were 6 games played in the Finals. Over the course of the series, The Penguins were called for 41 penalties. That's almost 7 a game. Detroit was called for 36 penalties. That's 6 a game, for you math-starved kids. Half of the games in the series (3) showcased more Penguins penalties than Red Wings penalties. Detroit was called for more penalties in only 2 of the games, with Game 5 evenly distributed at 6 penalties apiece. Factor in that the first two games, in which Detroit went up 2-0 in the series, the Penguins were called for 8 more penalties than the Wings (21-13). Now, a number of those penalties were a result of the scrum at the end of Game 2, but Pittsburgh was penalized to a greater extent in that fracas despite both teams pushing and shoving.

Gallagher is more concerned with the Pens not being called on a trip with hardly any time left in their season. Using this logic, should I write a freelance article for The National Post complaining how the disparity in penalties in the first two games changed the course of the series? Because last I checked, Chris Osgood still hasn't been called for his dives.

Now, let's look at penalty minutes. Cumulatively, the Penguins were assessed 94 penalty minutes. Detroit was assessed 74 penalty minutes. Again, taking the Game 2 scrum into account, there is no reason why in that game, the Penguins had 30 more penalty minutes assessed (46-16). Also, Gallagher talks about the goalie interference calls in the OT winner in Game 5. In that game, Detroit only had 4 more penalty minutes than the Penguins. (14-10). If I remember correctly, the Penguins won on a 4-minute high sticking penalty that drew blood. Prior to that, the officiating "slant" was pretty damn close (10-10).

So let's base our arguments off one missed call at the end of a fantastic Game 6 in which both teams had legit scoring chances late. Please don't look at the entire series, in which the Penguins had more penalties and penalty minutes than the Red Wings. Conspiracies obviously exist because the officials allowed the beaten team one last chance at a goal, not because we were seemingly in the box at every possible moment.

Tony Gallagher, go complain about something else. The Wings won and the series is over. Quit fabricating "stories" in your own mind.

Cedrick Wilson Released. No Double Standard

Cedrick Wilson was just released, following an incident with his girlfriend. Yes, the same girlfriend involved in this past January's armed-standoff.

Ced was charged with striking her in the face.

But wait, wasn't James Harrison arrested for the same offense...but he's still on the roster?

PFT and Mondesi's House discuss a possible double standard.

Horse Shit.

To this point, the Harrison incident was isolated. The man hadn't been in the news for similar disturbances. Ced, well, there seems to be more to his story than meets the eye.

Look at the timeline regarding Ced's recent troubles.

- Ced and girlfriend get into argument.
- Girlfriend fires gun in house, gets in standoff with police.
- Ced files Protection-From-Abuse Order against girlfriend, claiming she might kill him.
- Ced drops Protection-From-Abuse Order, provided girlfriend doesn't file one against him.
- Ced is charged with pushing girlfriend down, then punching her in the face.
- Ced is promptly released from the Steelers.

Here's the kicker. Re-read that 4th part of the timeline:

Ced drops Protection-From-Abuse Order, provided girlfriend doesn't file one against him.

Why would Cedrick Wilson be so concerned that a girlfriend he was afraid of might file a PFA against him. He was claiming to be an innocent victim of a crazy woman. Kinda fishy that he didn't want to have a PFA filed against him.

I don't know about you, but if I was a victim of abuse/torment/violent behavior, I wouldn't be trying to keep a PFA from getting filed AGAINST me.

People may ask why James Harrison still has a roster spot. I ask myself why half of the Bengals still have roster spots. Now, if there is more to James Harrison's story, then I'm all for letting him go, but the Ced incident and the Silverback incident are polar opposites.

And no, I don't condone abuse. Re-read my post about Harrison's incident if you need a refresh.

The Arrogance Of Massholes

I received an email from friend and fellow Steelers blogging compatriot Cotter from One For The Other Thumb. He talked about Patriots fans, and their need to gloat. Adding to the gloating, the Patriots fans continually make excuses for Spygate and Rodney Harrison's HGH use.

What the f**k is wrong with these assholes? I don't understand. Their team got caught videotaping other team's signals on the sidelines. But what, we made this up? That's not cheating? God damn frustrating man. Have you seen this exchange? -http://www.blitzburghreport.com/did-you-hear-that-anthony-smith-guaranteed-a-steelers-victory/

It's like they were waiting for us to lose so they could talk shit.

I don't get it.

After the Patriots won, Patriots fans bragged all over several Steelers blogs, including this one. I have links to several of the blogs further down in this post so you can check 'em out for yourselves.

Here's my thoughts:

The frustrating thing about Patriots fans (I refuse to use the nickname for the team, it only empowers Patriots fans) is that their recent string of success has completely blinded them. After the Celtics boom, there was little to celebrate in Boston. The Red Sox sucked, the Patriots sucked, the Bruins sucked.

Now, the Patriots success coupled with multiple Red Sox titles has overloaded the Boston ego, and they feel untouchable. Back in college, I had a real good buddy (two of 'em, actually) from Boston. They were typical Sox and Patriots fans. Evan and Bart were their names. They came from upper-class families, played lacrosse, wore pastel Polo shirts, talked traditional Masshole talk...the whole deal. Even after a hard night of partying, RAs would come to my room to separate myself and Evan for getting into Patriots/Steelers arguments. I loved the dude like a brother, but we always stressed our team's importance.

Despite all the concrete evidence I could give, Ev's argument would come down to, "3 Super Bowls...Tom Brady...Belichick...the Sox." I don't know why the Sox were thrown in there, but their success helped justify the Patriots' greatness. Now, the Sox only had one recent World Series title at the time, but that was a bragging point.

I'd counter with, "5 Super Bowls...Noll...Cowher...the laundry list of HOFers...the name Rooney...etc." Every bragging point Evan had, I'd counter with something better on our side. Hell, we were even at St. Vincent College, the Steelers' training camp, next to a dorm called Rooney Hall.

However, since the Patriots had 3 Super Bowls in the past decade, their organization was far superior. It reminds me of when me and you verbally jousted with Browns fans several weeks back. They continually used data from 60+ years ago to justify that Cleveland was superior to the Steelers. Likewise, Patriots fans use much more recent data, blindly omitting the fact that their team was an NFL afterthought prior to the 21st Century.

Which brings me to the cheating, Rodney Harrison and the idiot anonymous commenters on sites like Curtain, Doubt About It and here at PSaMP. Its like New England got a collective hardon when Anthony Smith guaranteed a win. When the Patriots won, their ego overflowed. Instead of high-fiving other Patriots fans, they felt the need to brag all over Steelers blogs. Now, I don't know about you, but even though I spent the week prior to the (second) Browns game on a Browns site defending the Steelers (here and here), I didn't go back once to gloat after we won. Gloating would've been classless. Browns fans repeatedly called us classless, as did the Patriots fans. But the Patriots fans decided to gloat. I'm dumbfounded how that math worked out.

Now, Patriots fans feel the need to stroke their ego so much, that this win over the Steelers now wiped the slate clean for all the wrongdoings from earlier in the season. Since Anthony Smith opened his mouth...and New England won...the Patriots are absolved of Spygate, or Rodney Harrison's HGH use. I asked a Patriots fan, "Would you be so smug if the Jets were caught videotaping the Patriots...then won the game?" No answer. And when I created a list of athletes/teams forfeiting games due to cheating/rules violations, the list wasn't good enough. I cited Olympic athletes and Tour de France riders stripped of championships for doping, the Black Sox, Michigan's Fab 5 having to remove their Final 4 banner for rules violations and Oklahoma football forfeiting the entire 2005 season's wins because of rules violations by the athletes and their coaches. The response...only the Black Sox were a pro team...and they willingly gave up their championship. Now, I guess cheating is different in the pros than it is in college, or in the Olympics, or the Tour de France. Cheating in the pros only gets you a draft pick docked, evidence immediately destroyed and your coach fined. And the pros are supposed to be the role models.

The Patriots knowingly cheated with the videotaping. Rodney Harrison doped, something that would've gotten him banned for life in the Olympics or Tour. Sam, from DAI said it best:

'...from the NFL rulebook:

"No video recording devices of any kind are permitted to be in use in the coaches' booth, on the field, or in the locker room during the game." They also say all video for coaching purposes must be shot from locations "enclosed on all sides with a roof overhead." How is that hard to interpret? I've never seen an entire fanbase so quick to defend something so indefensible.'

Now, he was talking about Spygate, but the last part covers Harrison, too. If the Steelers were caught cheating, or some player on the team was busted for a banned substance, I'd be the first person to chastise that team/player. New England fans would rather make excuses than explanations.

And its not just the fans. "Well done is better than well said." That Tom Brady quote was forced down our throats by the CBS crew calling the game, since Anthony Smith made that blatant guarantee. However, Tom Brady did not once come out and criticize Harrison for being fined $5k for taunting Brian Billick the week before. I guess a win erases wrongdoings...on several levels.

We've accepted the loss. There was no shifting blame. Anthony Smith made a mistake. The Patriots won. Now, Patriots fans have another rung on the ladder to run away from Spygate and Harrison's doping...at least in their minds. I don't know if they'll ever see the light.

All I know is that I'll be here to put them in their place.

This Is Why I'm Not Talking About The Pirates Right Now

This kid...at a Pirates game...just said,

"I'm Hannah Montana."

I might rename the site Pittsburgh Steelers/Penguins and Mini Ponies.

I'm just sayin'.

Happy Ghost Rider Anniversary, Ben Roethlisberger!

June 12th. A day that will live in infamy (sorry for stealin' your line, FDR).

Last year, on this very day, Ben Roethlisberger's Suzuki Hayabusa (all of Pittsburgh learned about that model) decided to take on a Chrysler New Yorker.

Big Ben's accident was startling to the entire city, if not the entire nation. After becoming the youngest quarterback to win a Super Bowl, Ben decided to take a few chances (take a few chances = ride Suzuki's fastest bike with no helmet).

Coverage of the accident escalated throughout the season, as Ben's fake face decided to struggle mightily. Was the accident to blame for Ben's failures? The appendicitis? An unblocked Bart Scott?

The Roethlisberger accident generated the kind of buzz that places it firmly in Pittsburgh sports lore. Most Pittsburgh fans can tell you what they were doing during the Immaculate Reception. Or any of the Super Bowl wins. Or any of the AFC Championship losses. Roethlisberger's crash became one of those instances.

I was at Nigro's restaurant in North Versailles, near Duquesne. That place has awesome food. My great-Aunt Metz (Mary, but she was Serbian) had just passed away, and the family gathered at Nigro's after the funeral. All at once, I heard several distant cousins talking about a crash. All I heard was, "stupid" and "Steelers" and "no helmet" and "motorcycle crash." Pretty soon, the topic of the day had shifted from Aunt Metz to Ben Roethlisberger. Pittsburgh sports icons have a way of displacing beloved family members.

If you remember where you were/what you were doing, feel free to drop me a comment/email.

Oh, and Happy Ghost Rider Anniversary, Ben!