VOTE FOR HHR!

Non-sports story real quick.

Take a minute and vote for my buds over at Hugging Harold Reynolds. They're up for the 2008 Weblogs Awards in the Best Sports Blog category.

I'm doing this because HHR is good friends with PSaMP, and they're facing a nearly insurmountable challenge. The current leaders have thousands of votes. HHR has a few hundred. So come on, people.

KSK SUCKS! APE IS A FAKE STEELERS FAN AND UFFORD IS A SEAHAWKS FAN WHO IS STILL PISSED ABOUT SUPER BOWL XL! THAT SITE IS NOT FUNNY AND SHOULDN'T WIN THE AWARD. ALL SUPPORT GOES TO HHR!

All joking aside, KSK is rightfully winning, because they have the readership and are one of the funniest sports blogs out there. Any other day, they'd probably get my vote. But I can't vote for them when my buds are directly competing.

And you should do the same. Vote for HHR!

Throw Music at Your Ears

Cotter started a music blog, and I'm an idiot a contributor. Check out my first post here.

Rest in Peace, Doubt About It

I'm gonna take the mic for a second and tell you about the death of a certain blog.

The guys at Doubt About It have closed up shop and took the blog out back. Gunshots were heard, and all we have left is the final post.

The end of a blog has a weird feeling. It happens so often, because most "bloggers" start a site and burn out within a month. Some of us can't let go, so we keep going because you keep reading. Assholes. DAI went strong for a year and a half. That's longer than you've ever blogged, so shut up.

I always had a closeness with DAI. When I started blogging, there was, perhaps, one major Pittsburgh sportsblog. Sure, there were a few good ones that only talked Pitt, Pirates, etc, but only one really that covered all Pittsburgh sports. So I used my knowledge and fandom to start PSaMP. Shortly after, DAI sprung up.

Since DAI started only a few short months after I started PSaMP, we sorta grew together. I watched what they were doing and they (hopefully) got a kick out of my work. I was more than honored when they imitated me in a faux conversation between Mondesi's House, The Pensblog and PSaMP.

When I hit my 6 month anniversary, I invited DAI to take part in an over-the-top 6 month celebration. They contributed a post as well as a MPotD.

But now, DAI is gone. In that final post, you'll find some truly interesting nuggets about blogging and the state of the Pittsburgh sports blogosphere. I urge you to read it. A lot of people don't have the balls to call out certain "big time" sports blogs, but DAI made sure you won't go away without a bit of dropped knowledge.

Did I always agree with everything DAI posted? Hell no, because I don't don't live in a buddy-buddy, everything is rosy type of world. But I respected that they continually put out quality material, and didn't bow to advertising dollars, recaps and glorified link dumps. Remember the Big Ben video game? Clutch.

So I salute DAI as they ride off into the sunset. The Pittsburgh sports blogosphere was a better place with them, and hopefully their words will make it an even better place in the future.

Santonio Holmes is Funny

Santonio updated his semi-new Yardbarker blog prior to yesterday's game, and it turns out that Holmes is kinda funny. Check out the joke he wrote:


It's the third quarter and the Steelers are running a no-huddle offense.

BEN: "Tone, Heath, Nate, Hines -- come on guys, line up."

Ben looks at Heath and gives him the wink.

HINES: "What's the play? Come on man, what's the play?!"

BEN: "I got this, I got this. Don't worry about it."


Funny, yes, but it would work better if Heath actually got a decent number of balls thrown his way. Heath could totally be a Witten-type player, but he doesn't have nearly as many chances as Jason.

But maybe Santonio was just stoned...so it all made sense.

Wikipedia Hates Dave Littlefield

I'm at my company Christmas party, so this is all I'm giving you. Enjoy this little nugget from my buds at TIGG:

Wikipedia Hates Dave Littlefield.

As does 99% of Pittsburgh.

I've told you about my hate of Power Rankings before, here and here. So knowing my opinion, check this out.

I don't mind Michael David Smith at Fanhouse. He's a good investigative blogger and writes 2 million posts a day at places all around the world wide web. But this is awful.

He put out Fanhouse's latest NFL Power Rankings. Giants 1, Steelers 2, Titans 3, Ravens 4. Lovely praise for Pittsburgh:

- "There haven't been many more impressive performances in the NFL this season than the one the Steelers' defense put together against the Patriots on Sunday."

But complete horseshit (mini horseshit?) about the Ravens:

- "...we shouldn't overlook what a strong year Haloti Ngata is having for the Ravens. Baltimore has the best defense in the NFL, and no one deserves more credit for that than Ngata."

Really? Let's look at those NFL stats again.



Looks like a clean sweep to me. Just a little more research next time, MDS.

First-Week Review of Versus' Sports Soup

You know how you never know what to expect outta something until you see it? Sports Soup on Versus fell right along these lines.

Let's explain. Last week, I was invited to meet with Matt Iseman, host of the new sports and comedy show along with two other bloggers. Matt and the channel were really intent on getting information and feedback from the untamed world of the sports blogs. And that's more than enough to pique my interest.

In person, Matt and the Versus people were great, but this was before the show aired. Could that translate to on-air success?

Look...I'm a blogger. Instant gratification is the name of the game. I exist in a world of Youtube videos, toilet jokes and stuff in the sports world that makes me laugh. I'm all for watching 15 year old America's Funniest Home Videos reruns. If I tune to a late-night sports highlight show...I want the clips, not the fluff. If I find something in the sports world that makes me giggle, it's getting a place of honor on my site.

Which makes Sports Soup appealing to sports bloggers like me. The show is what you could expect a sports and humor blog to look like on television.

And that's why Sports Soup came through in the clutch. Matt made it clear when we met, the show isn't hard-hitting journalism, and no news is broken. It's a place to show James Brown being ridiculously cordial, thank you so very much, or awkward pauses between auto and horse racing announcers. The first week introduced the show to the audience, and let viewers know what they can expect from here on out.

I think anyone who saw the first week and who understands the format will be back often. We're a week in, and the show already stands out as funny, unique and promising.

I'm A Poet

Yesterday, I received an email from Pat at WHYGAVS and the AOL Fanhouse asking if I'd be interested in writing a poem.

I agreed, mainly because I haven't written a poem since about 5th grade, and my poetry skillz could use some practice.

As it turns out, Fanhouse is pimping out some solid local bloggers to write a short preview for their respective MLB franchise...in poetry form. So far, there's been poems, limericks, a haiku or two...the whole deal.

Now, there are not enough drugs and not nearly enough booze to inspire someone to write a poem about our Pittsburgh Pirates, but I gave it a shot anyway. You can find my submission right here. Don't hate (too much).

MLB Poetry Previews: Pittsburgh Pirates

This Is Not "Browns Week"

Click on that picture for a larger view. Its from a Cleveland Browns blog. See if you can spot the weird combination of words that you will never find on a Steelers blog.

I took the time to peruse through a few Browns blogs, and I am scarred for life. All kidding aside, I wanted to see what some Brownies bloggers were saying about this week's match up between the top two teams in the North. As much as I hate the Browns, I will give some very little credit to the team for turning around what could have been a disastrous season. That's all the credit I'll give to our "rival."

I use quotation marks around the word rival because we've beat Cleveland 8 straight and 20 of the last 23 times.

Here's a compilation of what they're saying about this week's game over in Browns-land.

Dawgs By Nature. Are You Ready? Its STEELERS Week:
This isn't the Browns team that we saw in Week 1. This is the Browns team that has the offensive firepower to take down the Steelers, and just like the Colts/Patriots game was hyped all of this past week, you'd better believe that this is the "game of the year" for Browns fans.

-PSaMP's take: Didn't Cincy have the offensive firepower to take down the Steelers as well? Don't forget that our D hasn't given up 100 total points yet through 8 games.

Commenter on the Dawgs By Nature post:
Personally, as long as the secondary can step up and knock the crap out of Ward, I'll be happy.

-PSaMP's take: Let's ask Bart Scott and Ed Reed what they think about that comment.

Ace Davis' Cleveland Browns Blog. A Sporting Chance:
An upset at Pittsburgh would be a tremendous boon, no doubt. But even if the Browns, dare I say it, lose to the Steelers and even the Ravens the following week, they still will have a decent shot at the post-season if their confidence and health are not destroyed in the process.

-PSaMP's take: Confidence and/or health will be destroyed. Write that down. Still, Cleveland has a gravy schedule after the Pittsburgh game.

Brown's Locker. The Browns Have Claimed CB Ricardo Colclough:
[Colclough] has played in 36 games (0 starts) in his NFL career and he has made 60 tackles, 2.5 sacks, defensed 7 passes, had 1 interception and recovered 5 fumbles. This was a nice low risk/high reward move by the Browns.

-PSaMP's take: I'm not even going there.

Browns Gab. Browns Are A Different Team:
The Browns lost their season-opener at home to the Steelers, 34-7 as the offense managed just 221 yards. The Browns offense has taken off since Derek Anderson took over at quarterback as they’ve averaged over 31 points a game. The Steelers also collected six sacks, but Browns offensive line has allowed just one sack per game since the Pittsburgh loss. Crenenel believes that this meeting with the Steelers will help his staff get a better evaluation of where the Browns are in their development.

PSaMP's take: James Harrison doesn't care for your one sack per game since the Pittsburgh loss ratio.

Mistake By The Lake. Born And Raised On The Cleveland Browns: Week 9:
The Browns crush the Pittsburgh Steelers so mightily, all the Steelers players will retire, all the Steelers fans in attendance will commit themselves to an insane asylum, the Heinz corporation will go bankrupt, the color yellow will be removed from the spectrum of visible light, and The Fish That Saved Pittsburgh will be banned from cable reruns forever.

PSaMP's take: That piece of satire actually made me laugh in a "that is kinda funny" way. Well done.

I'll be looking for the streak to hit 9 consecutive and 21 of the last 24 straight games. The Browns have improved, but the Steelers D has been rock solid. And Bennifer is rolling. Steelers will win at home. Done and done.

PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza: The Pensblog

(To commemorate the 6 month anniversary of PSaMP, I invited some of my favorite bloggers to take over PSaMP for a week. I'm calling it, PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza. Well, its been extended to an obnoxiously long two week blogapalooza, per se. Several kickass local and national blogs agreed to share their feelings on Pittsburgh sports. Hopefully, some will also provide a Mini Pony of the Day. In my mind, it will rule. I hope you enjoy it. Tuesday's blog is The Pensblog. I've said it before and I'll say it again, if you don't read Pensblog, you don't read anything good. This whole half birthday extravaganza has been purposefully obnoxious. Pensblog, though is here to shed some light on blogging for you non-bloggers (noggers, if I do say so), including why a 6 month anniversary rules. Tons of kind words from an awesome blog. I can now say that Pensblog has touched me. Take that however you want.)
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We joined the blogging ranks in September 2006.

Just as we assumed when we heard the word "blog", a lot of people hear the word and immediately think of Jimmy Nerd clacking away at a keyboard, typing out some self-gratification and the meaningless minutiae of his daily life.

That misconception was justified when blogging was in its infancy, but it's not the case anymore.

The more and more blogs you find on the internet, the more you realize you are reading the writing of someone who is either passionate about a topic or knows a buttload about a topic.

There's blogs for celebrity gossip, cooking recipes, and video games.

Anyone with an inkling to write and something to write about can start a blog with the click of a button.

Coupled with a peeked interest in the topic, you'll be talking about a big-time blog.

A true case-in-point for this is the blog NHL Tournament of Logos; a blog that was started in early 2007 with an aim to bring all news and rumors surrounding the NHL's league-wide shift to new uniform designs during the summer of 2007.

The result: It became the one-stop shop for anyone wanting to know any information regarding the uniforms.The site achieved 1 million hits by mid-August.The author was featured in an interview on CBC Radio.

............................................................................

And now, easily the biggest genre of blogs on the internet are in relation to sports.

A specific sports team is a never-ending topic. You always have something to write about, nearly every day.

With our blog, we realized that we didn't want to just recycle news stories from major newspapers and media outlets.

We didn't want to read four paragraphs of analysis.

We'll go to a newspaper for that: The newspaper will even have quotes from athletes and the insight that only a beat writer covering the Penguins for 20 years can bring.

On the same token, we were tired of being talked down to by some blogs and columnists, making us feel like we need to baby-fed information on a topic that the said blog or columnists thinks he knows more about than anyone.

Our goal with this blog has never been to be funny.

We write things that make us laugh when we write it, and if it happens to make other people laugh, sweet.

We don't claim we know everything about the Penguins.

Saying you're a team's #1 fan is something that should've faded from your vocabulary by freshman year in high school.

But forming this blog has let us meet and talk to people who love the Penguins as much as we do.

.........................................

And this is where PSAMP comes in. Created on March 13, 2007, it has been entertaining us with unreal pictures of mini ponies and solid commentary.

Now, a lot of people will say, "Big deal. Six months ain't nothing."

But running a blog ain't no picnic. Many blogs have the shelf-life of a month. It takes time, a lot of work, and passion in order to do something that has no return benefits whatsoever. Some people just give up.

But not PSAMP. It has been consistent, refreshing, and always there. And really, how is it possible to find so many pictures of mini ponies?

As much as we are all trying to build our own websites up, without the whole blogging community thriving, everyone suffers.

Now, mind you, there are blogs we think suck. But that's with anything. People will come to our blog and immediately despise it for no reason.

All in all, PSAMP, we salute you. Your presence in the blogosphere makes us all better humans.

Congrats on the six-month, and we'll see you in March for the one-year.

- The Pensblog

PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza: Sportsocracy

(To commemorate the 6 month anniversary of PSaMP, I invited some of my favorite bloggers to take over PSaMP for a week. I'm calling it, PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza. Well, its been extended to an obnoxiously long two week blogapalooza, per se. Several kickass local and national blogs agreed to share their feelings on Pittsburgh sports. Hopefully, some will also provide a Mini Pony of the Day. In my mind, it will rule. I hope you enjoy it. Monday's blog is Sportsocracy. The site, if I may, "is more than a blog, more than a website, more than a podcast…it's a way of life. It's Pittsburgh sports, uninformed opinion, love of 90s culture, and random weirdness made into an unstoppable, lumbering, sasquatch." Right on.)
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James Harrison Is One Bad Mutha.


I've always had a love/hate relationship with James Harrison. I can see his allure. He's a big, surly, undrafted free agent out of Kent State that came to camp in 2004 and made the Steelers roster as crazy Joey Porter's backup. A true walk-on in a town that loves a blue collar underdog. On the other hand, he's a career backup who just so happened to be in the right place at the right time when Porter was jettisoned before this season, and ended up with his starting job. He's probably not a whole lot more than a spot pass-rusher in reality and his heirs, namely my boy LaMarr Woodley and Lawrence Timmons, are already walking among us.

Still, he's got some of the best Steeler highlights of the past few years...

Intercepting a pass against the Chargers in 2005 and hurdling over the attempted tackle of LaDanian Tomlinson.

Attempting to kill Chad Johnson with a German suplex in a game.



And perhaps, most famously, applying the "Silverback Slam" as it's been coined, what I can only describe as a German suplex into a choke slam, to an unlucky Browns fan that picked the wrong day to run into the field of play.


On top of that badassery, the guy was carted off on a backboard in Week 2 against the Bills with a stinger, had his facemask cut off, and RETURNED TO THE SIDELINES IN THE SAME GAME. Don't get me wrong, Willis Reed he ain't. But still, I imagine the scene in the locker room as a doctor telling James he's ok, but should get out of his uniform and hit the showers (in the most heterosexual of ways), Harrison basically tearing the straps off holding him to the board, and walking back through the tunnel to the field. It probably didn't play out with that much pinache or drama, but here's hoping.

Sportsocracy

PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza First Week Wrap Up

I can't believe I made it through nearly a week without full control of PSaMP. To this point, I've been the sole thinker/writer/researcher/editor of this here site, and turning the reigns over to other bloggers was different, to say the least.

I hope you enjoyed Week 1 of PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza. Some cool bloggers stopped by, and provided some worthy reads. I hope you'll stick around next week when Week 2 goes down. There's several other blogs/bloggers on tap for next week, and I expect a repeat in quality.

Thanks again to you, the reader, for making the first 6 months as painless as possible. Without your clicks, reads, comments, emails and hates, this wouldn't all be worthwhile. Everything here is yours. I'm happy I can bring you a different perspective (as well as pictures of cool little horses). PSaMP FOR THE PEOPLE!

Week 1 Wrap Up.

Monday - Larry Brown Sports (LB's MPotD)
Tuesday - Doubt About It (DAI's MPotD)
Wednesday - Sheena Beaston (Sheena's MPotD)
Thursday - Awful Announcing (AA's MPotD)

Follow the links (or just scroll down the page) to re-read these awesome posts. They're worth it. Many thanks to all who participated in Week 1!

PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza: Awful Announcing

(To commemorate the 6 month anniversary of PSaMP, I invited some of my favorite bloggers to take over PSaMP for a week. I'm calling it, PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza. Well, its been extended to an obnoxiously long two week blogapalooza, per se. Several kickass local and national blogs agreed to share their feelings on Pittsburgh sports. Hopefully, some will also provide a Mini Pony of the Day. In my mind, it will rule. I hope you enjoy it. Thursday's blogger is BP, the creative voice behind Awful Announcing. AA is one of the best all-around sportsblogs out there on the interwebs. If you don't read it everyday, you are stupid. BP is here to let you Pens fans know why the team lost to the Caps in 1994 in the playoffs. Unbelievable stuff.)
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I wanted to take this space to bash everything that is the Steelers, but really what is there to bash as of late? They have a pretty great team, and now that Joey Porter is gone (BEEYAH!) you can't really make fun of them anymore. Well at least until I see their fans come out of the coal mines to make the trip down to Baltimore in December and experience yet another clash of Puke Yellow versus Purple Camo.

But no, I'd like to share another story that few have heard me tell. The year was 1994 and the Pittsburgh Penguins were staying in the hotel I was working at because they were in a heated playoff tilt with the Washington Capitals. The Caps were up 3-2 in the series and had a chance to close out the Pens the next night in a game I was going to. The Penguins had an entire floor and I was in charge of Room Service for the night. I had about 60 or so trays to deliver throughout the night and ended up meeting just about everyone on the team, but Mario Lemieux. Most of the guys were foreign and I couldn't remember who any of them were, but the last room I delivered to at around 9pm I recognized the players right away.

The very last room on the hall had three of the Penguins' best players in it just hanging out. Tom Barasso, Kevin Stevens, and in full mullet...Jaromir Jagr. Stevens told me to come in and roll the cart with the tray on it into the corner. As I did I noticed that they looked like they were getting ready for a night on the town. I asked where in Annapolis (MD) they were thinking about heading to thinking they'd grab a cab and make the 10 minute trip. Stevens relayed that they weren't allowed to leave the hotel room because they had a game the next day and that they were going to hang out in the hotel bar Secrets.

Now what you have to understand about Secrets was that it was single guy heaven. Before the term "Cougar" was invented this was their den. I bid adieu to the guys and as they took the elevator down to the lobby, I headed back to the Kitchen. My Manager (a 40 something year-old woman from New York) and the Assistant Manager (a gorgeous 30 something year-old woman from L.A.) were there to ask me how it went. I said fine and that some of the players were going to be hanging out in the bar. For some reason the two of them just started giggling and asked who was in there partying. I relayed that it was Stevens, Jagr, and Barasso and within seconds they were posted up at the bar with the trio.

I was only 15 at the time, but I was in good with the bartenders so they let me sit next to the bar and watch whatever sporting event was on at the time while I waited for my Mom to pick me up (it's actually where I saw Joe Carter's walk-off homer against the Phillies in the WS). I had never seen my two Managers act like this and at about 10pm I left to one of them sitting on Kevin Stevens' lap.

Fast Forward to the next day Thursday, April 28th. My mom was taking me to the game that day and I told her that I needed to stop by work to pick up a paycheck to cash so I could get some garb at the game. I walk through the empty bar at around 3pm and in to the Kitchen to find my boss telling a story to two other female employees. I asked her for my check and she tells me to hang on for a second. I make small talk with the dishwashers, but quickly grow impatient as she's whispering this story across the room. I walk behind her to hear her say the funniest and most shocking thing my 15-year old ears had ever heard.

"Kevin and I were up until 5am at my place just going at it. I've never been that wet in my life."- Manager Lady

She spun around to see me standing there, and immediately did the "you didn't hear anything" routine and to "never repeat what I had heard". I was a late-bloomer so I really didn't even know what she was referring to anyway. Well to make a long-story short it turned out that she and the assistant manager took all three players to her house and had an all-nighter that only her, the Penguins, and God know the details of.

Of course the Capitals won the game that night and eliminated the favorites to win the Stanley Cup from the playoffs. I don't know what they did to him but somehow Tom Barasso gave up six goals (one empty netter) in defeat. And I saw it all go down. It's moments like that I wish I had started my blog in the early 90s.

- BP, Awful Announcing

PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza: Sheena Beaston

(To commemorate the 6 month anniversary of PSaMP, I invited some of my favorite bloggers to take over PSaMP for a week. I'm calling it, PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza. Well, its been extended to an obnoxiously long two week blogapalooza, per se. Several kickass local and national blogs agreed to share their feelings on Pittsburgh sports. Hopefully, some will also provide a Mini Pony of the Day. In my mind, it will rule. I hope you enjoy it. Wednesday's blogger is coming at you sans blog. Its my older sister, Hannah. She comments as Sheena Beaston, and created the lovely PSaMP logo banner. Also, a hilarious Sheena Beaston original LeSean McCoy Photoshop will be unveiled in the near future. Enjoy her words. Or face my wrath.)
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When Oh, Henry! Bars Ruled the World (or how I learned to love Pittsburgh sports through thick and thin.

House lights, please. [tap, tap] Is this thing on?

(whispers from the audience: “Who is this? Who does she think she is? She doesn’t even have a blog! What’s going on here!?!”)

Net-posting credibility aside, you will not (and I firmly pronounce this) find another female with a more enhanced knowledge of Pittsburgh sports than that of thine own.

(glances at TSW and shivers in my timbers...)

And yes, I love me some disclaimers, italics and parentheses...so, I would’ve gone all women’s lib and said I was the smartest PERSON re: ‘Burgh athletics, but I’m pretty sure my brother takes the cake on that one.

And in case you have yet to figure it out. tecmo_bowl_bo_jackson is blood. (Not like we’re in a gang or anything, but I’m his older sister. Not that much older...just a scattering of years. 2.5 to be exact. Thanks.)

Enough prefacing. On to the stank.

Ever since I can remember, sports have always been prevalent in my life. Whether it was participating in raucous games of wiffle ball with my family or totally dominating 5 years of slow-pitch softball in elementary school. (I cherished my neon pink and black batting glove. And grape Big League Chew. Still do. I’m chomping it now.) Or even playing a game of catch with a “sister of the cloth” in our backyard. Seriously, this nun was so tall and fierce that Andre the Giant would’ve run away screaming.

My dad was always a sports aficionado and I recall him spinning the yarn and regaling on watching Roberto Clemente at Three Rivers Stadium in the glory days. “He once chased a ball down in the far right field corner, stopped on a dime, whipped around, and gunned down a runner at third. If I’m not mistaken, he one-hopped it to perfection.”

The earliest memories of attending professional sporting events stemmed with a chance stumbling upon a much desired candy bar in the checkout line at Hills department store in 1988. (Western PA readers know what I’m talking about. Best “second-rate department store” popcorn that 79 cents could buy. Take that Kmart.)

Irregardless, Oh, Henry!’s nutty chewy goodness was soon to be in my mouth. (Yikes. Kids, close your ears) Upon unwrapping said treat, some verbiage caught my eye.

“Present this wrapper at your local Major League Baseball team’s ticket office and receive a Peanut Heaven ticket for only $2!”

(I guess something about the peanuts in the candy bar and the general reference to seating in peanut heaven made for a marketing whiz’s dream. Apparently, mine too.)

Our family was, and still is, quite thrifty. So, we ate enough Oh, Henry! bars so we could all enjoy a Pirates game together for a ridiculously discounted fare. (We were also big fans of exchanging Pepsi cans for $5 tickets to SandCastle. So yeah.)

So we loaded up the clan in our maroon Plymouth Voyager minivan and headed to Three Rivers Stadium. We had a ball. And a blast. I only wish I remembered who the Buccos played that day. But what I do remember...

...it was the bottom of the 9th and the score was tied 3-3. Buccos had the bases loaded with Bobby Bonilla on third, Rafael Belliard on second, and Barry Bonds on first. Andy Van Slyke (sigh) at the plate. And he gets walked. Bringing in the winning run. The crowd went nutso, as did I.

I remember walking out of the stadium to our maiden ship parked miles away. (Again, thriftiness beats pricey stadium parking). Everyone pulling out of the parking lot had their windows down and were hooting and hollering as if we’d had just won the World Series. I remember joining in the festivities and screaming nonsense. High-fiving my brother and sister like it was going out of style. It probably did go out of style that night.

Ultimately, this was the tale of how Oh, Henry! saved my life. Or rather, how I became a die-hard Pittsburgh sports fan no matter what.

I do sincerely apologize for my Adult Attention Deficit Disorder rantings. But these only prove the passion I have for a team that has gone through 14 losing seasons in a row. And how I will stand beside them no matter what.

I can only hope that my dangling a pack of Marlboro Reds on a string in from of Jim Leyland’s face will bring back the glory days of MY late 80’s Pirates. (Much like a carrot in front of a horse. Or dare I say, mini pony. Which is an extremely accidental, yet gorgeous segue into my MPotD.)

Cheers,

Hannah aka Sheena Beaston

PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza: Doubt About It

(To commemorate the 6 month anniversary of PSaMP, I invited some of my favorite bloggers to take over PSaMP for a week. I'm calling it, PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza. Well, its been extended to an obnoxiously long two week blogapalooza, per se. Several kickass local and national blogs agreed to share their feelings on Pittsburgh sports. Hopefully, some will also provide a Mini Pony of the Day. In my mind, it will rule. I hope you enjoy it. Tuesday's blog is Doubt About It. In its relatively short lifespan, DAI has become a PSaMP fave. Its written by, "four guys who all love Pittsburgh and Pittsburgh sports." Well said.)

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I hate Red Sox Nation. Absolutely despise it. Any time I see a kid with a green Red Sox hat cocked slightly sideways on his head, you know they became a fan circa 2003. Apologies to those hardcore fans who suffered through the curse until ’03, but the new found fans have cheapened your image. Even Bill Simmons admits there is something wrong here. What bothers me even more is when people mention Steelers Nation in the same breath as the Red Sox or Yankees Nation. You see it on message boards, you hear it when you visit Ohio or go east of State College. There is a general hatred towards us. Part of it is encouraged by our own insecurities, part of it from jealousy, and the last part is from Seahawks/Bengals apologists who can’t admit the better team won in 2005.

People still think our ranks only swelled due our success in the ‘70s. In Mexico, where you’re either a Cowboys or Steelers fan due to the populations’ discovery of the gridiron in that time period, this may be true. But in the USA the emergence of Steeler Nation occurred due to the economically forced diaspora of the 80s and 90s. Everyone who has lived in Pittsburgh knows this. The rest of the nation, not so much. You want proof? The Post-Gazette has compiled a list of Steelers’ bars, a list as vital as the invention of the internet and printing press. There are over 120 reported Steelers’ bars in California, 9 in Alaska, 1 in Peru, and 3 in Iraq. Fans who pledged their allegiance when they were 15 because they enjoyed being with a winner do not start their own bars in honor of the team. These are mostly Pittsburgh originals or offspring of those emigrants, men and women born with an identity. There is an entire blog devoted to this phenomenon.

Don’t get me wrong, if you started rooting for the Steelers even though you lived in Arizona you’re welcome to join the party. Just know that you better be able to respect the city, nay, embrace the city as your own. Other fans hate us for this. They hate the fact we completely and totally connect the Steelers and the city of Pittsburgh, as if they were one symbiotic sentient being. They call us fools, they say our priorities are misguided, they claim we cling to the franchise because we have nothing else to cling to. As Doubt About It favorite Dejan Kovacevik over at the PG proves with his amazing “Thing I Love About Pittsburgh” feature at the end of every daily mailbag, we as Pittsburghers simply know the truth. More so than any city in the nation, Pittsburgh is analogous to college. You are there for a certain number of years, you wish you could come back after you leave, and you feel a loyalty to your alma mater and a general unity to all those who shared your experience.

I know, even if you agree with me, that last paragraph was probably the most romanticized crap you’ve read all week, so I’m going to move on to the next more aggressive topic: Global Domination.

I’m not a sociologist, or whatever field would work with population trends, but I think I understand some basic principles. In order for a population to increase, on average each woman needs to produce more than two kids. The two kids replace the two parents, thus keeping the population at the same level, while a third one would increase it. The Russians have faced a problem with this, as their women are only getting knocked up enough to produce 1.39 children each. I’m not the one to answer what 39% of the second child is produced, but bear with me. The U.S. faces a similar problem with the baby boomers, who had around 17 siblings each, and currently the ladies are only producing at a 2.09 baby/woman rate. Not a good rate for the U.S., but excellent for Steelers’ Nation.

When an Eagles fan marries another Eagles fan, a likely scenario since most fans are found in the Philly area, they need to produce 2 Eagles fans just to keep the fan base at the same level. The Steelers, on the contrary, have so much of their fanbase spread throughout the nation that they have a much higher rate of Steelers fans marrying non-Steelers fans. Let me ask everyone a question: if you married a Bungles fan (God forbid), what team would your progeny root for? I’m pretty sure I know the answer. Now before the ladies’ Steelers’ fans assume they can’t override their sports loving husbands, let me remind you that per tradition the children usually assume their mother’s religion, and in Pittsburgh what is a more universal religion than football? But apparently the Pittsburgh females already knew this.

Each time a Steelers’ fan marries a non-Steelers’ fan, then, they only need to have 1 kid to replace themselves, while having two kids doubles their presence. I’m not sure of the exact percentage, but when almost half of the Pittsburgh population goes to spread its seed elsewhere in the 80s, I’d be willing to wager that Steeler Nation has increased its ranks percentage-wise more than any other fanbase in the country.

In the future, I expect Steelers’ lobbyists on Capital Hill, annual meetings, and soon thereafter the first President of the United States who ran on a pro-Steelers platform. By the year 2379 resisting Emperor Art Rooney X will be futile.

- Doubt About It

PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza: Larry Brown Sports

(To commemorate the 6 month anniversary of PSaMP, I invited some of my favorite bloggers to take over PSaMP for a week. I'm calling it, PSaMP's Halfie Birthday Extravaganza. Well, its been extended to an obnoxiously long two week blogapalooza, per se. Several kickass local and national blogs agreed to share their feelings on Pittsburgh sports. Hopefully, some will also provide a Mini Pony of the Day. In my mind, it will rule. I hope you enjoy it. Monday's blogger is Larry Brown of Larry Brown Sports. He also writes for the ridiculous AOL Fanhouse. Today, Larry writes for PSaMP. Destroy him if you disagree. I'll allow it.)
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Well, I used to hate the Penguins because they were in the same division as my favorite team, the Bruins. But then the Pens got Sid the Kid and some other really cool players, so now I don't mind em as much. Also helps that they're in a different division now too. The Pirates really haven't been worth much more than a few sentences in like a decade, so I'll pass on them. I guess I'd like to share with you a few thoughts on the Steelers.

I can't stand the Steelers. I highly dislike the Steelers. In fact, they are just one step below serious and utter hate. See, I'm a Bengals fan. And it really didn't matter, rain, shine, Kordell, Tomczak, or whatever, the Steelers always seemed to win. I liked to attribute it to the coaching of Bill Cowher. Because of that slapdick and his persistence, the Steelers always seemed to be a good team. They could lose an All-Pro every off-season -- it seemed like they did -- yet they were still always in the playoff hunt. In fact, I really count the Steelers in the same class as the Patriots for being so organizationally sound. So even though I can't stand the Steelers, and up until recently I could count on them to hand my Bengals two losses every single year, somewhere, deep down inside me, there is a small little area in my body where I compartmentalize a great deal of respect for the Steelers organization. That being said, I still wish upon them a century of 0-16 seasons.

- Larry Brown

So Many Links...

You may have noticed that my blogroll has grown extensively.

I decided to add all the Pittsburgh sportsblogs that I know of/have read. I meant to do this a long time ago, but I procrastinated. Call it what you want (apathy/laziness), but I finally found time to put up those links. Check 'em all out. At the same time.

If you run a Pittsburgh sportsblog that I don't know of/forgot to link to (most likely the latter) and want to be put on the list, drop me an email at psampmail@gmail.com.

Oh, and the 2nd installment of Inside the Athletes Studio will run tomorrow. I figured I'd tease you a little bit. Now you can spend the night wondering who PSaMP interviewed. All I'll say is...they're important. And its a worthwhile interview. Check it out tomorrow.