Jason Bay Traded!

Jason Bay was just traded. To either:

The Rays, or:

The Red Sox.

The Sox rumors seem to be stronger. The move would let the Dodgers acquire Manny Ramirez, with Pittsburgh somehow getting four prospects.

UPDATE: The trade woke up the corpse of Deadspin-era Will Leitch. Bay to the Sox. I'm anxious to learn about the prospects coming to the Burgh.

BLOW YOUR MIND UPDATE: One of the prospects is third baseman Andy LaRoche, brother of current Pirate and ADD sufferer Adam LaRoche. I retire.

The other prospects are right-hander Bryan Morris from L.A. and outfielder Brandon Moss and reliever Craig Hansen from Boston.

Get Inside MAF's Eyes (Yuck)

Awesome.

This video, from MAF's time in Wilkes-Barre during the NHL lockout season, shows what it's like for an NHL (ok, AHL) goaltender. After finding this on Youtube, I noticed that Pensburgh had a stellar post about it yesterday. Eerie. Chest bumps go their way as well.

The Kenny Loggins was a bit much, but one could easily refer to the crease as the "Danger Zone." Next time you're sitting with your buddies claiming that you could duplicate MAF's save after save after save after save, re-watch the above video and know your role.

The only question I have...would you strap on the helmet cam and face shot after shot for 7 years/$35 mil? Prior to seeing this video, I'd say yes. After watching how quickly professional hockey players crash the net, I'd most likely reconsider. A mere water bottle break can cause a scoring opportunity, and goalies have to be right back in the game even if the puck is being cycled at the far end of the rink.

A Chris Osgood helmet cam would show a Penguin breathing on him, then the camera immediately focusing on the ceiling. Get it? It's 2 months later, and Osgood is still a diver. I'm joking, but Steelers training camp is only getting me worked up for Penguins season as well. What, you thought I'd ride it out with the Buccos?

God, I miss those yellow pads.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-31-08

Eat up, buddy. That apple looks exceptionally delicious.

Cutest. Meal. Ever?

That picture comes from here, which also had the below image.


Don't worry...from the caption, little dude is just sleeping.

Mini horses and sheep are cooler than you, but that doesn't mean you should stay away from today's reads:

Air racing rules. [Deuce of Davenport]

Which NBAer on the Olympic squad uses the alias SpongeBob SquarePants in Beijing hotels? Dwight Howard is a good guess. [Larry Brown Sports]

What old athletes should come back to their sport of choice? [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

New Yankee Pudge Rodriguez's career numbers might be a little inflated due to PEDs. [Was Watching]

Ari Fleischer found his way into sports. Please kill ESPN's approval rating, Ari. [Signal to Noise]

MSM Hockey scribes dig Photoshop. [Puck Daddy]

Jordan Staal Is A Golfer

(h/t to Bleacher Report and Net News Ledger)

Following the Happy Gilmore standard for getting people interested in golf, the Freedom 55 Financial Thunder Bay Hockey Celebrity Golf Classic, held this past weekend, used hockey players as a means of upping the cred of the tournament. My only question, why didn't the tournament invite Chris Simon? They missed a golden opportunity, what with "most time spent in the penalty box" and "taking off a skate and trying to stab someone."

Pittsburgh's own Jordan Staal, seen on the far left, was present at the tournament. This picture signifies a change in PSaMP, where I can only give you grainy pictures where you can barely make out the subject. Stay tuned next week, when I find the world's first camera phone and use it to take you inside the Pirates' locker room.

Jordan's brothers Eric and Marc played in the event, as did NHLers Mike Richards, Alex Auld, Patrick Sharp and Taylor Pyatt. The golfers bid at the beginning of the day on which athlete they wanted golfing in their group. Eric went first, with a bid of $1,500. Whore. Well, in the best sense of the term "whore." The tourney has raised over $50 grand over the past two years for cancer research. Cancer in Thunder Bay is about to be murdered, thanks to time donated by the classy NHLers.

Trevor Letowski was also there. Good thing the organizers didn't invite Colby Armstrong.

My only question, did Jordan use the NHL's hockey stick putter? Since Jordan's still a year away from contract negotiations, I'm gonna guess the $115.00 asking price might be a bit too steep.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-30-08

I have no clue, so don't ask. Land of Little Horses is near Gettysburg, so that should explain the Civil War characters on the horses' backs.

Is that Marc Staal on the left? And the chick...

...Hey, baby!

If you aren't preparing your mini horse for war, you should be reading these links:

Russian fans sue their favorite team. Can we do this with the Buccos? [Lion in Oil]

Gil Arenas just bought a sick pool, but it cost $700k less than Big Ben's water hole. [Larry Brown Sports]

Do not pull your junk out on a plane, or you'll go to jail for a year. Note to self: What not to do... [The Big Picture]

Daniel Sepulveda tore his ACL and is out for the season. SHIT! [Post-Gazette]

Cotter's pissed about it. [One For The Other Thumb]

Can you be a fan of two teams in the same division? [Rumors and Rants]

Birds Are Steelers Fanboys

Macaws rule.

What with training camp starting up, football fever is in the air. It's entirely different from both hockey and baseball love lust. Don't get me wrong, I'll fight to the death to defend the Buccos and Penguins and my tireless support of both teams, but the Steelers evoke unique sets of emotions.

So unique that blue and gold macaws feel the need to pump up the fan base.

Now, to be fair and rational, the voice over guy could have probably said any sentence in this history of words, and the macaw would counter with a "charge" chant. Consider:

"It's raisin-drying season!"

"It's my wife's time of the month!"

"It's soccer season!"

"It's time to do my taxes!"

"It's time to get your wings clipped!"

Say any of those with the same tone of the "It's football season" quote, and macaw would most likely go off. The only reason this video gets a place of honor on PSaMP is because said macaw owner is clearly a fan of the best football team in all of organized sport, and his bird totally backs his love. "Don't believe I'm a Steelers fan? My bird will totally vouch for me!"

Mini Pony of the Day 7-29-08

Say cheese! Get ready for your closeup.

Little boy looks so sad that he's trapped within the fence. An ideal world would let miniature horses roam wherever they so choose. Sadly, we don't live in that world.

Dream big, and read these links:

Sirius and XM will now be one. I don't have either, so I don't really care. [The Sporting Blog]

The Gorillaz have a hand in the Olympics. I've always wanted to type that sentence. [Stereogum]

Geno and Gonchar are not spending their summer relaxing. [The Sweater Ted]

The Cubs sell ice cream the honors new Brewers pitcher CC Sabathia. [Big League Stew]

Rush Limbaugh wants to buy the St. Louis Rams. I'd throw out a quick one-liner, but I can do no better than that sentence. [The Ghosts of Tropicana Field]

Former FSN Pittsburgh personality Trenni Kusnierek is the object of a lot of affection in Wisconsin. [Chuckie Hacks]

Congrats To Goose Gossage

I wanted to make a quick mention to send congratulations to former Pirate Rich Gossage, who was inducted into the HOF this past weekend.

Buccos.com was the only info you'll ever need about Goose's one year in the Burgh:


A fan favorite in Pittsburgh, "Goose" Gossage perhaps had his best MLB season his only year as a Buc in 1977: 151 strikeouts in 133 innings, with a superb 1.62 ERA.


Exactly. All the congratulations in the world go to Gossage. Although you were only in town for a year, Pittsburghers are happy to have shared in your success.

Just In Time For Training Camp, PSaMP Helps You Explore Latrobe: 2008

There are a few posts from PSaMP's past that can easily be re-used in different years while remaining true to current events. Last year, I posted the best places in and around Steelers training camp to poke your head into. I've reposted the list below, with a few edits to keep the info up to date. If you go to camp, be sure to check out a few of these cool places!


Aside from surviving the heat in order to see your Steeler heroes, Latrobe offers a bevy of cool hangouts that might not be an everyday stop to the casual Steelers fan. Latrobe's website tells us the obvious:

No matter where you go in the United States, the mention of the name Latrobe, Pennsylvania will likely generate a response like "that's where they make Rolling Rock Beer!"

Unquestionably, the amber beverage brewed from mountain spring water that comes in green bottles is the most recognized consumer product produced in our area. It's all made in one place, here in Latrobe, by the people of Latrobe Brewing Company, a division of Labatt's USA Inc.

Rolling Rock, which has since moved on, has been a staple in the Laurel Highlands. However, I feel ridiculously qualified to tell you about some other cool places to hang out once the 2-a-days end. I graduated from St. Vincent College in 2007, and had four years to brush up on everything from the local hotspots to the hole-in-the-walls.

Peter King of SI named St. Vincent the best training camp in the NFL back in 2005. Believe me, SVC milked that for all it was worth. One thing writers like Peter King don't know are the cool places in the immediate vicinity of the training camp itself.

Here's a list of awesome places you can go with family, with that special someone or just with yourself. Again, if I mention any names/people, tell them Nick from SVC recommended the place.

- Lloydsville VFD Social Hall. Very underground, this one. Also my favorite place in the area. As is the norm with VFD's/legions/etc., you need to be a member. Or, you can throw down a one-time 20 dollar initiation fee, coupled with annual 5 dollar dues, and you'll more than get it all back in one night. 60 cent beers and buck twenty tallboys are lethal combinations. Throw in the free pool table and shuffleboard table and you've got yourself a great night.

I participated in the shuffleboard league primarily because I'm an old man at heart. My buddy Fal and I were late to the registration, and were only allowed into the competition because one couple was forced to quit. Dude's name was Wayne Love, and he was the coolest. He and his wife, Debbie, formed the Lovebirds team (since their last name was Love, duh). That was the team name two college dudes inherited. We secretly called ourselves Team Seed (for whatever reason) and made it to the championship game. A series of unfortunate events caused me to miss the championship game, killing any chance of Fal carrying the team. 2nd place bites.

Wow, a bit off topic there. Anyway, go on a Monday. Linda pulls a double shift, working the morning and evening crowd. Tell her Nick from St. Vincent sent you and you'll be good to go. Oh, and if you can't find a member to begin with, email me at psampmail@gmail.com. I haven't been here since I've moved to NYC, and from what I can guess, Linda doesn't work there anymore. Still...cheap beer!)

- Idlewild Park and Soak Zone. Diehards only know this as Idlewild. Soak Zone appeared within the past decade or so. This place is great for families (especially great for silvertops). Its a ten minute drive from St. Vincent, and has all the mid-range amusement park rides you can handle.

Like going 15 mph? Check out the Little Dipper. 35 more your speed? The Wild Mouse will kick your ass. Wanna puke? Spin around and around on the Caterpillar. Need your kid fix? Storybook Forest will remind you about all those Aesop's Fables-types, or you can go to Mister Roger's Neighborhood on the Trolley. Um...ok! I always cried my ass off when it got time to go to the cargo net (pictured above) in Jumpin' Jungle. Scary net...

- Mountain View Inn. I worked here. I was a banquet server. You'd rake in the dough on Mother's Day.

This place is great if you want a quaint hotel. None of the rooms are decorated alike.

Rolling Rock sponsors a bar called the 33rd Street Tavern, which is a little more pricey (by Latrobe's bottom-shelf standards) but is a place well worth checking out. Lots of neat (crappy) local bands/singers on a regular basis.

- Nopalito's. Literally like 5 minutes from campus. I'll let the website do the selling. Plus, I know like half of the toolbags pictured on the site.

- Dino's Sports Lounge. Word of advice, you can't get in if you're wearing a baseball hat. However, its worth it.

The Sweet & Hot wings are ridiculously amazing. However, if you're brave, go for the Lewis (or Super Lewis, if you dare) wings and burn your mouth off. I don't know if he works there anymore or not, but ask for Sean the Cook. He'll give you cool samples of the Super Lewis if you're a wussy (haven't used that insult in like a minute) and don't want all your wings infected.

- Rosa's. High volume beer. Everywhere. Need a 30-pack? Don't settle at any distributor. Go to Rosa's. Plus, they have an excellent humidor that's absolutely stocked with fine cigars. My buddy Joel had a Rosa's fix. He'd have like 2 new cigars every day.

- St. Vincent Gristmill. Right on campus. You won't even need to drive to get to this one. This crazy place has been run by the Benedictine monks for years. They make all kinds of flour and bread, and also have a stellar coffee shop.

Once there, you can check out the display I made in the museum regarding old Jim Beam Whiskey Decanters (again, I haven't been there in quite some time, so I have no idea if the display is still there).

Oh, and there's a dead monk's spirit in the body of a cat. That cat freaked me out on several occasions. You should go see it.

- Lincoln Lanes. C'mon. Who doesn't love to bowl? Plus, Lincoln Lanes has a bar inside of it. They serve Stoney's cans. Can't find those bad boys anywhere. And if that's not enough, the Touchdown Club, another full bar, is attached to the LL building. You can literally watch fools bowl from a one-way mirror at the TD Club.

- Falbo's Restaurant. Tuesday spaghetti special. 99 cents. This is an SVC must-go-to bar. Ask if/when Pat's working. He'll give you the hook-up.

We celebrated one of my buddy's birthdays there. A few too many Three Wise Men rocked us to sleep (incoherency).

- Linn Run State Park. Two words. Natural. Waterslides.The water cuts through the rocks, forming the smoothest grooves that you can sit (stand, you wussy) and slide on. They empty out into natural pools and are a great way to beat the heat. One time, this dude's raft floated like a mile down the creek, and me and a buddy went and tracked it down, successfully reuniting frantic owner and his craft.

Or you can hang out at the waterfall that's pictured on the homepage. I've been under it. There isn't much water. I think somebody poured a bucket of water down it for that picture.

- Sharkey's Cafe. In a constant struggle with Dino's for Latrobe-wing-supremacy. The winner of this epic battle? Me and you.

Sharkey's makes good Washington Apple shots. One too many birthdays here. We had my buddy MattyG's 22nd birthday at Sharkey's, and me and him ended up walking back to campus. Well, we got most of the way, before his (now ex) girlfriend picked us up in front of a watchful trooper.


Have a look around the cool little city and you'll be sure to find other swell places. A few more to check out include Reeb's Bar, DiSalvo's Station, Derry Highrocks, Rolling Rock Brewery (defunct) LeNature's Water Plant (also defunct), Tractor Supply, Cineburger (now Latrobe Family Cinemas), Route 30 Drive-In, Sheraton Inn, National Tire and Battery, Westmoreland Mall, Statler's Fun Center, Arnold Palmer Airport, Hollow Tavern, Jioio's, Laurel Hotel, etc. Email me if you need directions to any of these places.

See the Steelers. Go exploring. Tell 'em PSaMP sent you.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-28-08

My dad sent me these pictures. He works at a home for the elderly poor, and recently, the residents went and visited some mini horses in Eastern PA. Now, we have the visual documentation of the day.

If you aren't currently visiting a farm of miniature ponies, you should be reading the following links:

Sara Khoshjamal (?) > Kobe Bryant. [Mix Makers]

Steelers fan Hank Williams Jr. will sing the MNF for the 19th year. [Awful Announcing]

Cooley's beard winner revealed! [Chris Cooley]

Training Camp is finally here. [One For The Other Thumb]

Apparently, the Nady trade "sucks more than Paris Hilton." [Suburban Rob Rossis]

A Cincinnati Reds drinking game. We need one of these for the Buccos. [Bite My Tongue For No One]

Darnell Stapleton Rules

See kids, if you strive to be a reserve Offensive Lineman on one of the most storied franchises is NFL history, you too can roll into odd VIP parties where women are begging to get pictures taken with you.

Darnell Stapleton, who just made it onto the team last season, is obviously the man. I'm a Steelers freak, and I wouldn't recognize him if he appeared in the club next to me. I'm guessing the appearance had some prior publicity, or else people in Orange, NJ really love their backup Steelers.

Or, it probably helps that Stapleton went to nearby Rutgers University.

Either way, the video is too great not to post.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-25-08

Dude, Itty and Bitty rule. What a clutch find. Check out the other bits of wonder in that link. You bet I'll be poaching more little horse pictures from that link.

I didn't even know miniature was a language.

Read these links...in miniature!

Aaron Rogers will not suck this season. [Epic Carnival]

Well, I guess Jim Zorn is now officially awesome. [Stet Sports Blog]

Baseball umpires are such technology nerds. [Hugging Harold Reynolds]

50 year old WNBA HOFer Nancy Lieberman to play pro basketball again. [Blog of Hilarity]

ESPN's NFL Blog Network isn't bad, but its a complete ripoff of PFT. [Awful Announcing]

Eddie Vedder is cool but the Red Sox suck. [Sons of Bill Simmons]

Rashard Mendenhall Is Beetlejuice

Hat tip to Mondesi's House for the picture.

MH shows evidence that Beetlejuice (nsfw), the weird, tiny little man best known for his Howard Stern Show appearances, is a proud member of Steelers Nation. Personally, I admire him most for his award-worthy role in Bubble Boy.

The picture and write-up is uncanny, because I was planning on making a Beetlejuice mention today. I've been trying to put my thumb on who Steelers draft pick Rashard Mendenhall looks like, and my thoughts echo those on several random message boards. Listen to these:

- "Mendenhall looks like a non ******** version of beetlejuice [sic]." DChess on Draft Countdown Forums.

- Posted pictures of both Mendenhall and Beetlejuice, Catch17 on CowboysZone (requires registration).

Now its time for you to decide (NFL Juice say they look nothing alike, but posted this picture):



100%.

(Side note: No disrespect to Rashard. Well, as least amount of disrespect as possible when one likens you to Beetlejuice. Its not the teeth, or short appearance or wacky antics. Its the eyes. Definitely the eyes.)

Mini Pony of the Day 7-24-08

Its raining in NYC, so a picture of the beach should cheer me up. A bit, at least. You best believe I'll take my mini horse(s) to the beach when I get one (or a few)!

And the owner...

...Hey, baby.

Chariots of Fire was playing in my mind when I read these links:

Ichiro tried to escape Seattle. [The Sports Hernia]

Want your child to win at tennis? Talk to them via earpiece during the match! [Larry Brown Sports]

Brett Favre won't be going to Philly. Not like he would've helped them win a championship or anything. [The 700 Level]

British sprinter's 78-year-old grandmother is FAST! [Fanhouse]

Bernie Williams news? Wasn't expecting that. [Armchair GM]

The Packers released one-time Steelers draft pick Cameron Stephenson. That might hurt the team a bit. [Press-Gazette]

Did I Just Find The Culprit In The Case Of The Steelers' Flawed Super Bowl IX Ring?

I'd be a horrible sports blogger if I didn't go making up rumors and posting them to the Internets for all the MSM to gasp over. So here's a little nugget for you in place of actual news or funny videos and pictures.

Earlier this week, we learned the story of the Steelers Super Bowl IX and X rings that were sold on eBay for a nice round figure of $66,000. Astute readers pointed out that on the SB IX ring, there was a mistake in the score of the Steelers' win over Buffalo. The real score was 32-14. The ring states 32-6. We're pretty gracious people in Steelers Country, and don't want to gyp Buffalo out of 8 points in the playoffs. With all the heartbreak they've suffered in their postseason history, we'd be jerks if we only acknowledged 6 of their total 14 points scored that day.

But whose fault is the error?


"I'll be damned," said Joe Gordon, who headed the Steelers public relations and marketing from 1969 to 1998. "I find it almost impossible to believe because so many of us checked it."


So...not Joe or any of his cronies.


"Anytime something of that magnitude is involved, Dan Rooney would have handled it," Mr. Gordon said. "And Dan is so meticulous in everything he does. I find it almost incomprehensible."


So...maybe Dan, but highly unlikely.

Being that its the first Super Bowl ring in team history, I'm going to guess the Steelers looked over every bit of that ring design before it went into production. Sure, most of that faith comes from my Steelers-centric homerism, but for argument's, and this rumor's, sake, let's guess the error didn't come out of Pittsburgh.

Let's assume the problem arises from Minnesota.

Remember the awkward moments in high school when you got a glossy brochure filled with tons of rings for you to pay out the ass for to wrap up your secondary education? Gold, white gold, diamonds, rubies, simple, extravagant. I didn't buy one, because high school rings are stupid. Well, the company that tried to get you to purchase their products, Jostens, also makes the Super Bowl rings.

Here's where it gets interesting.

Jostens is based in Minneapolis. There's an NFL team in Minneapolis, in case you didn't know, that goes by the name Vikings. The ring in question commemorates Super Bowl IX, in which Pittsburgh bested the Vikings 16-6. Now we've got something.

Come on, Nick, you're just overreacting and trying to make the puzzle pieces fit. Uh, damn straight. Look at this little tidbit (emphasis mine):


A check with Jostens, the Minneapolis-based jeweler that produced the rings, proved that while the Steelers' original design had the accurate score, the ring molds -- which the company keeps in a large vault -- show the wrong score. And no one ever noticed or corrected it.


All of a sudden, rumors start to make sense.

Did Jostens take exception to the hometown Vikings losing their second straight Super Bowl, and purposefully flaw the ring in such a way that only the guilty parties knew of and some inquisitive nerds would find out decades later? I'm sure we'll never know the exact truth, but its interesting when you have all the information. Most fans would pass it off as an honest mistake, but honest mistakes don't make sports blogs interesting.

I'm on to you, Jostens. Not only do you dupe kids into buying overpriced rings that they'll never wear...or if the do wear 'em, they look like dorks...but now you've gone ahead and pissed off Steelers Nation. I'd suggest keeping your brochures out of Pittsburgh-area schools from now on, ya twerps.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-23-08

I cannot complain anytime I get an email with a subject of, "I MET MINI PONIES!"

Special thanks to Holly for emailing me the two cool little buggers at the top of this post. These guys live in horse country north of L.A. Without the head, I'm still going to have to give the human in the middle a solid...

...Hey, baby.

Go find your own mini ponies, high five a friend if you come across some, then read these links:

Gary Bettman Photoshop contest. [Puck Daddy]

Someone wire me $400 bucks so I can get this chair for the office. [Deuce of Davenport]

More Super Soakers in IndyCar please. [Lion in Oil]

Did Rick Mahorn push Lisa Leslie? I watched for a second, then realized it was the WNBA and turned it off. [Can't Stop The Bleeding]

Don't like the call in your rec-league basketball game? Shoot the ref. [The Sports Point]

Matt Birk and Charles Woodson rule. [fuhbaw]

R.I.P. Estelle Getty

That sucks.

Big Ben's Pool Is Sweet

From the lovable primate Christmas Ape and the DC Steeler Nation Yahoo group comes exclusive pictures of Ben Roethlisberger's hot-ass new pool in Gibsonia.

Looks like Ben bought his house a purty little present with all that extra cash that's been lying around. The pool cost $1.7 mil, chump change for the quarterback. That's be like me finding a $100 bill and taking $1 of it and murdering three digits worth of penny candy. It may seem a bit frivolous, but when you have an extra $99 million in the bank, you can afford whatever you want. These options include a pool with your football number tiled into the bottom or some Warheads and candy cigarettes.

Other features include a waterfall in which to hide from all those Gibsonia-based paparazzi and a shallow-end, granite-topped bar with sunken barstools. There's a grill somewhere as well.

POOL PARTY AT BEN'S!


**More goodness at Sean's Ramblings

The Pittsburgh Colts Dance Team Is Clutch

Funny Shit!!!!

Hey guess what? Training camp starts in a week, the Penguins signed some people and the Buccos offense looked hot last night. So today, I'm going to discuss...the Pittsburgh Colts.

The semi-pro team is playing their home games at Cupples Stadium on the South Side, home to our Pittsburgh Passion. It was in looking for more info on this team that I found the above video. Its from last season, but I've never seen it. And since its from Webshots, I doubt you've seen it as well.

First off, dance teams rule. I literally have no problem with dance teams (except for my high school letting a weird dude onto the squad in one of my last years there).

I'm not going to lie, though...I could probably rock out most of those moves, save for maybe the assisted cartwheels. I'm guessing these are the chicks, most likely from the Pittsburgh DancExplosion (I see how they did that).

So yeah, watch that video while I try to convince you that this isn't a completely bullshit post to keep you occupied. I'm going to go study the game film and cut a rug.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-22-08

Best. Camera angle. Ever.

Nice. I feel like I could get down with whatever show/play/event this is. Mainly because...

...Hey, baby.

When I wasn't checking out this chick, I was reading these links:

Freddy Sanchez is a gazelle. [The Black and Gold Blog]

James Farrior wants to retire as a Steeler. You would too if said team got you a Super Bowl ring. [Steelers Gab]

Do you miss ATH and PTI? Nope? That's what I thought. [Awful Announcing]

The only reason rollerblading is cool. [With Leather]

Mike Tomlin can't afford a sophomore slump. [One For The Other Thumb]

I, too, associate HNIC with something other than Hockey Night in Canada. [Eddy Spaghetti]

Bob Smizik Hates You Because Someone Else Booed Jaromir Jagr

(tiniest. picture. ever.)

Shame on Bob Smizik.

As seen in today's MPotD links, The Pensblog called out Bob Smizik for, well, calling out all Pittsburgh fans. Unfairly, I might add.

Just listen to this logic:


In Pittsburgh, they regularly and vociferously boo the second-greatest hockey player to perform for the beloved home team.

In Pittsburgh, they boo the kid third baseman who had put up Roberto Clemente-type numbers until he was mysteriously traded.

...

And now these people are rubbing their hands in glee with anticipation of Feb. 8, when they can show the world the depth of the Pittsburgh knucklehead population. That's when the Stanley Cup champion Detroit Red Wings make their only appearance at Mellon Arena in the 2008-09 regular season. The knuckleheads aren't excited about a chance for the Penguins to get some measure of revenge for their loss in the Cup final. No, what they can't wait for is the chance to rain down boos on Marian Hossa.


The dreaded "They" and "These people." Really? Let's look at this rationally. Many Pittsburgh fans boo Jaromir Jagr. I am a Pittsburgh fan. By Smizik's math, I boo Jaromir Jagr, am wetting my pants about the possibility of booing Marina Hossa and I'm a knucklehead for my antics.

Filler newspaper articles like these absolutely kill me. The blogosphere catches way too much flak for irrelevant stories, made up rumors and downright mean pieces. We (yes, I'll speak for more than just myself) get yelled at by the Bissingers, put down by mainstream media outlets and are generally kicked around by anyone with a beef. What mystifies me is how mainstream media outlets allow articles to be published with little to no research. Why didn't Smizik go out on the street and grab a couple Penguins fans to see if his assumptions were true? Is he above that? Does he have that much of a thumb on the Pittsburgh landscape that his assertions more or less sum up the local experience?

Look, I don't boo Jaromir Jagr. The man is a legend in my eyes and I'll always respect what he did in Pittsburgh. Hell, I even admitted my hatred for Jagr-booers (?) back in April. But alas, my wrists have been sufficiently slapped by the investigatory journalism of Bob Smizik.

So let's flip the script. Time to use the Smizik Method for Successful Journalism:

"In Pittsburgh, all newspaper writers are bitchy and complain as if they have gas."

"In Pittsburgh, they (all writers) refuse to research, or at the very least, interview a fan."

"In Pittsburgh, all writers pass off gravy articles thinking this is still the 80s where the only cognitive response would be in an unpublished letter to the editor."

I'm sure no other writer in the city would take offense to being grouped together with this clown. Either evolve or disappear, Bob.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-21-08

Wow, the weekend needs to be a lot longer than just 2 days. I think we got a raw deal on that one.

This little dude is doing what I'm wishing I was doing right now. Lucky mini horse.

Dream about the following links:

Bob Smizik is old and needs to go away. [The Pensblog]

Tick, tick-tick-tick-tick-tick. [One For The Other Thumb]

Dan Snyder with his yearly faded veteran pickup. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

So let me get this straight. Skymall > Sports Illustrated? [Gheorghe: The Blog]

Would you eat a beetle for $30? [Capital Times]

Heath Ledger was in the right frame of mind before he passed. [Carbolic Smoke Ball]

Can The Civic Arena Be Saved?

Is it possible to save the Civic Arena? I say no, but these pictures are quite intriguing.

I was directed to these concept drawings after reading a piece on Bleacher Report about the future of the Civic Arena.


...rather than settling for the destruction of Mellon Arena once the Penguins' new home is completed, why not "re-use" the arena[?] Robert [the concept artist] suggested turning the Mellon Arena into an area that includes shopping, restaurants, and other public-use, revenue-generating spots.

Furthermore...

...it would likely be much more difficult to convince the Pittsburgh politicians that the current Mellon Arena area would be better served as a public entertainment area than a parking lot for the new arena. Considering the massive fallout that has resulted in recent months about the construction of the new arena (across the street from Mellon Arena), suggesting that more work be done in the same area (the Hill District) could cause Jake Wheatley's panties to accumulate in much more of a bunch than they have been in since the arena construction was approved less than a year ago.


As sad as I am to see older venues go, it would take nothing short of a miracle to save the Civic Arena. What with all the development in the Hill District and the space needed for the new arena, its seems less than feasible to keep the Igloo. While it would be cool to see the Civic Arena used for shopping, shows and lower-level hockey, success in a future version of the Civic would only undermine the proposals of the new arena, set to be used as a multi-purpose venue rather than just a home for the Pens.

All in all, its an interesting idea, and one that resonates with a history and sports buff like myself. Keeping the Civic Arena in some capacity would be a brilliant move, despite it being a farfetched idea.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-18-08

Through the hoop!

Props to the photographer for catching this little dude mid-to-post-jump. I heard little horse was jumping to read these links:

Why isn't it August yet? [Epic Backhander]

This needs to be the new Hockey Night in Canada theme. Turn your sound UP! [Puck Daddy]

ESPN's "Titletown" is stupid. [Epic Carnival]

Have you seen those Brady Quinn gay website ads on Facebook? I have, and they make me laugh like none other. Quinn might sue. [Larry Brown Sports]

Sam Cassell is focused on head coaching opportunities, not pole dance competitions. [You Been Blinded]

I can't stay away from Meeting People Is Easy. Read my answers here. [One For The Other Thumb]

2008-09 Penguins Schedule

I did this with the Steelers, so courtesy of the Penguins website and NHL.com, here's your 2008-09 Pittsburgh Penguins schedule (home games in yellow):

Sat., October 4th @ Ottawa, 2:30 PM (Sweden)
Sun., October 5th vs. Ottawa, 2:30 PM (Sweden)
Sat., October 11th vs. New Jersey, 7:30 PM
Tue., October 14th vs. Philadelphia, 7:00 PM
Thur., October 16th vs. Washington, 7:30 PM
Sat., October 18th vs. Toronto, 7:00 PM
Mon., October 20th @ Boston, 7:00 PM
Thur., October 23rd vs. Carolina, 7:30 PM
Sat., October 25th @ New York Rangers, 7:00 PM
Tue., October 28th @ San Jose, 10:30 PM
Thur., October 30th @ Phoenix, 10:00 PM
Sat., November 1st @ St. Louis, 8:30 PM
Thur., November 6th vs. Edmonton, 7:30 PM
Sat., November 8th @ New York Islanders, 7:00 PM
Tue., November 11th @ Detroit, 7:00 PM
Thur., November 13th vs. Philadelphia, 7:30 PM
Sat., November 15th vs. Buffalo, 7:30 PM
Tue., November 18th vs. Minnesota, 7:00 PM
Thur., November 20th @ Atlanta, 7:00 PM
Sat., November 22nd vs. Vancouver, 1:00 PM
Wed., November 26th @ New York Islanders, 7:00 PM
Fri., November 28th @ Buffalo, 7:30 PM
Sat., November 29th vs. New Jersey, 7:30 PM
Wed., December 3rd @ New York Rangers, 7:00 PM
Thur., December 4th @ Carolina, 7:00 PM
Sat., December 6th @ Ottawa, 7:00 PM
Mon., December 8th vs. Buffalo, 7:30 PM
Wed., December 10th @ New Jersey, 7:00 PM
Thur., December 11th vs. New York Islanders, 7:30 PM
Sat., December 13th @ Philadelphia, 1:00 PM
Thur., December 18th @ Atlanta, 7:00 PM
Sat., December 20th vs. Toronto, 7:00 PM
Mon., December 22nd @ Buffalo, 7:00 PM
Tue., December 23rd vs. Tampa Bay, 7:30 PM
Fri., December 26th @ New Jersey, 7:00 PM
Sat., December 27th vs. Montreal, 7:00 PM
Tue., December 30th vs. Boston, 7:30 PM
Thur., January 1st @ Boston, 7:00 PM
Sat., January 3rd vs. Florida, 1:00 PM
Mon., January 5th @ New York Rangers, 7:00 PM
Tue., January 6th vs. Atlanta, 7:30 PM
Thur., January 8th @ Nashville, 8:00 PM
Sat., January 10th @ Colorado, 3:00 PM
Tue., January 13th @ Philadelphia, 7:00 PM
Wed., January 14th vs. Washington, 7:30 PM
Fri., January 16th vs. Anaheim, 7:30 PM
Sun., January 18th vs. New York Rangers, 3:00 PM
Tue., January 20th vs. Carolina, 7:30 PM
Wed., January 28th vs. New York Rangers, 7:30 PM
Fri., January 30th @ New Jersey, 7:00 PM
Sat., January 31st @ Toronto, 7:00 PM
Tue., February 3rd @ Montreal, 7:30 PM
Wed., February 4th vs. Tampa Bay, 7:30 PM
Fri., February 6th vs. Columbus, 7:30 PM
Sun., February 8th vs. Detroit, 3:00 PM
Wed., February 11th vs. San Jose, 7:30 PM
Sat., February 14th @ Toronto, 7:00 PM
Mon., February 16th @ New York Islanders, 2:00 PM
Thur., February 19th vs. Montreal, 7:00 PM
Sat., February 21st @ Philadelphia, 1:00 PM
Sun., February 22nd @ Washington, 3:00 PM
Wed., February 25th vs. New York Islanders, 7:30 PM
Fri., February 27th @ Chicago, 8:30 PM
Sun., March 1st @ Dallas, 3:00 PM
Tue., March 3rd @ Tampa Bay, 7:30 PM
Thur., March 5th @ Florida, 7:30 PM
Sun., March 8th @ Washington, 3:00 PM
Tue., March 10th vs. Florida, 7:30 PM
Thur., March 12th @ Columbus, 7:00 PM
Sat., March 14th vs. Ottawa, 3:00 PM
Sun., March 15th vs. Boston, 3:00 PM
Tue., March 17th vs. Atlanta, 7:30 PM
Fri., March 20th vs. Los Angeles, 7:30 PM
Sun., March 22nd vs. Philadelphia, 3:00 PM
Wed., March 25th vs. Calgary, 7:30 PM
Sat., March 28th vs. New York Rangers, 1:00 PM
Wed., April 1st vs. New Jersey, 7:30 PM
Sat., April 4th @ Carolina, 7:00 PM
Sun., April 5th @ Florida, 5:00 PM
Tue., April 7th @ Tampa Bay, 7:30 PM
Thur., April 9th vs. New York Islanders, 7:30 PM
Sat., April 11th @ Montreal, 7:00 PM

Janne Pesonen's Cult Song Is Insane

Someone hand me a bunch of acid please. At least then I'll have a bit of an explanation for this.

Jesus Pesonen? Wait...two chicks? Dammit, back to Janne Christ.

I never question where nicknames or theme songs come from. I like to sit back, enjoy some fan's creation and laugh at the absurdity. The Pensblog and Free Candy? Awesome. It even spawned its own video. At least it was in English, though.

I've made no effort to hide the fact that Janne's my guy going into the season. However, I'd like to better understand his cult song.

Does anyone speak Finnish? All I hear is "Nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah nah nah nah."

I've tried to translate the song, which is "Pelimies" by Martti Vainaa & sallitut aineet. The only semi-normal-sounding phrases are:

"package Teen mitä but , pump iron"

"scurrying screw vernacular"

"Teen bundle its less tense out-of-date"

"Tactful touch ( touch ) health its concede ( concede ) Access move ( move ) night too?"

"package Is anybody extraneous , which pattern stumble"

"Tule thus mild thee cafeteria"

"meat is robust while meat is dull"

"night am victor"

"Glorious hirvet and glorious lion"

Awesome. I'm going to go ahead and guess the Finnish-English translation failed on several different levels. Because when I think Janne Pesonen, I think, "meat is robust while meat is dull."

This crazy video makes me so happy.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-17-08

Baaaaaaa!

Sorry, that's the first thing that came to mind. According to this, the horse's name is Tonto. I can't even formulate a cognitive response to group mini ponies and The Lone Ranger together.

Hi-yo links?

Bill Cowher left because he knew about the impending ownership struggles? [OFTOT and PFT]

Are you ready for the NHL schedule to be released? [The Pensblog]

FJM with the much-anticipated response to Murray Chass's stupid new website. Right on. [Fire Joe Morgan]

ESPN the Mag. Quit it with the shirtless dudes. [Desipio from Awful Announcing]

Best. T-shirt. Ever? [MGO Blog]

Congrats to the fine people at Ballhype. Honestly, in all conversations I've had with the team, they've come off as classier than you. [Ballhype]

Ray Allen > TMZ Photographers

Jerome What?

Jerome "The Bus" What?

I'll admit, Ray Allen has always been one of my favorite NBAers. This just ups his coolness in my eyes.

A TMZ photog hounded Ray after leaving a club in L.A. Said photog didn't know Jerome Bettis' last name, causing Allen and his crew to stop what they were doing and harass the ignorant paparazzi. Bennis? Bennett?

Ray was on my shit list recently. As much as I hate Boston, I was cool with watching both Ray and KG win a ring (PP, too). Despite my love for the individuals, they still helped Boston's ego expansion (if that's even possible at this point) with the championship. But the main thing...I'll still bust out NBA 2K7 on the 360 just to play with Seattle. Ray, Rashard Lewis, Chris Wilcox, Squatch. I tried last night and Ray Allen let me down. Big time. Like 2-12 on threes or some Larry Hughes-type nonsense. I swore a lot.

Luckily for Ray, he was caught on video defending Steelers legend Bettis. I shall forget the brick after brick simply for this two minute long glimpse into Allen's life.

Thank you, TMZ. You have restored my faith in Ray Allen.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-16-08

I just got off the subway, so this picture seems to fit. Unfortunately, I didn't have a cool little horse with me.

These people > me.

Today's links, brought to you by little horse's shoes:

Are you good with graphics? Design Going Five Hole's new logo. [Going Five Hole]

How will our roster shape out? [The Sweater Ted]

Jonathan Papelbon...F***k you! Might be one of the best things I've ever read. [The Sports Hernia]

That MMA chick murdered Robin Yount's niece on American Gladiators. Don't worry, we've all typed that sentence before. Semi-NSFW. [On 205th]

A bit older, but probably the definitive piece of photographic evidence of A-Rod and Madonna. [LOLjocks]

You've forsaken us, Dick Tarnstrom. [Jasper's Rink]

Kevin Jones Might Sign With The Steelers?

FWP.
Rashard Mendenhall.
Mewelde Moore.
Kevin Jones?

I'm not going to go into this in great detail, primarily because it isn't a done deal, but reports say that former Lions flash-in-the-pan Kevin Jones might sign with the Steelers today. Its either Pittsburgh or Chicago. Let's look at his options:

In Pittsburgh, Jones has no real role. Najeh was released for this very reason. Fast Bill is the man. Rashard Mendenhall is the up-and-comer. Moore looks like he could be the third down back who also solidifies the return-man position.

In Chicago, Jones has a chance to be the guy. I say this with caution, since it is Kevin Jones we're talking about. However, Chicago let Thomas Jones go last offseason, only to eventually release Cedric Benson. Jones would most likely compete with the other Adrian Peterson.

Now, I don't want to speculate too much, since this isn't a done deal and Jones might go elsewhere, but I'm confused as to why Jones is even being considered. Our RB corps is pretty badass by itself, and Jones is coming off knee surgery. Time will tell if he dons the Black and Gold.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-15-08

Man, why are these mini ponies so hard to get at? Mini ponies should always be accessible as hell. Stupid trees in the way.

While walking through the woods to get to these cool-ass critters, I came across these links:

Clay Counsil rules. [Tirico Suave]

Speaking of Counsil, Josh Hamilton's first round in the Derby was unreal. [Youtube]

Do not boo Chase Utley. [The 700 Level]

Carbolic Smoke Ball has been redone. It is...amazing. [Carbolic Smoke Ball]

Rock Band 2 track list just came out. I cannot wait. [Pitchfork Media]

Peace, Ted Nolan. [Puck Daddy]

Passion Season Ends With Loss To Force

Unfortunately, the Passion season came to an end in the Conference Championship game over the weekend. I'll let longtime reader and Passion megafan smarchit take over:


The Passion season came to a disappointing close this evening in the IWFL Eastern conference championship game at the hands of the host Chicago Force

The game was a hard hitting defensive struggle throughout, but the Passion managed to draw first blood midway through the 2nd quarter, capping off a 65 yard drive with a 1 yard TD run. The Passion held a slim 7-0 lead at halftime, and maintained that advantage through the 3rd quarter.

At around the 5 minute mark of the 3rd, the hard hitting of the Chicago Force started to turn the tide of the game a bit. While picking up a key first down to move the Passion inside the Chicago 30 yard line, Pittsburgh starting QB Lisa Horton was knocked out of the game by Force safety Linda Bashe, and replaced by backup Kara Prentice. With Prentice at the helm, the Passion were unable to move any further until a 4th down pass that came up short of the sticks, turning the ball over on downs at the Chicago 10 yard line. The Force were able to get a few passes to get out of their own end and towards midfield, but were eventually forced to punt again. The punt was nearly blocked by the Passion, but Chicago got it away, and benefited from a good bounce that pinned Pittsburgh down inside their own 2 yard line.

Number 3 QB (technically a #2b, but officially 3rd on the depth chart) Janice Masters took over for Prentice, and helped give the Passion a little more breathing room, before they were forced to punt with about 8 minutes to go in the 4th. Chicago took over at the Passion 48 yard line, and started to move the ball. Pittsburgh had Chicago down to their final gasps though at 6:47, facing a 4th and 1 from the 33. On the 4th down attempt, the Passion had appeared to stop Chicago short, but a timeout had been called just before the snap, giving the Force a second chance. This time, they converted on a QB sneak by Samantha Grisafe, to continue the drive.

Behind the powerful 2nd and 3rd effort running of Force FB Melissa Smith, Chicago got the ball down to the 1 yard line. From there, Grisafe did the rest, calling her own number to get the Force on the scoreboard with 4 minutes to go.

Then lightning struck for the 2nd time in as many playoff games for the Force, as Melissa Smith converted the 2 point attempt for an 8-7 Chicago lead. Horton came back into the game on the ensuing Passion drive, but Pittsburgh was unable to move the ball again, and facing a 4th and 2 with just over 2 minutes left, fumbled away the ball back to Chicago.

With all 3 timeouts still in their pocket, the Passion defense was able to force a 3 and out, and got the ball back one last time at their own 31 yard line, with 45 seconds left to go. After a false start on first down, Horton nearly hooked up with WR Wilma Walton on a 1st and 15 needle threading sideline pass. But Bache was able to knock it away on a bang bang play, bringing up 2nd down. On 2nd and 15, Horton wound up and threw again, but Theresa Simon stepped up and intercepted the pass, sealing the deal.


Rough way to end the season, especially for a team that had won a championship the year before. It is difficult to assume what the team expected this year, what with the success of last season and the uncertainty of a move to a more demanding conference. Sure, the team still has an unreal regular-season win streak, but I bet that's little consolation after losing a conference championship.

On behalf of Passion fans everywhere, I'd like to congratulate the team on a thrilling season filled with tons of wins and and one crushing loss. I pity any team that has to play the Passion next season, as I bet the team has a little extra motivation in '09.


Passion Season Recap:

Game 1: 62-0 win over Central PA Vipers

Game 2: 34-8 win over Boston Militia

Game 3: 38-34 win over D.C. Divas

Game 4: 38-0 win over Columbus Phantoms

Game 5: 28-0 win over Baltimore Nighthawks

Game 6: 28-21 win over New York Sharks

Game 7: 54-6 win over the Holyoke Hurricanes

Game 8: 17-12 win over the D.C. Divas

Playoffs

Game 9: 41-6 win over the Orlando Mayhem

Game 10: 8-7 Loss to the Chicago Force (above)

Mini Pony of the Day 7-14-08

For some reason, I thought I used this image before. I searched, but found nothing. Its from Wisconsin Sportsblog Chuckie Hacks. Many thanks to Doug for sending that my way.

Crack open a cold one and browse the following links:

It isn't safe to be an MLB mascot in the Bronx. [Busted Coverage]

Billy Packer is gone. Prayers are finally answered. [Miami Herald]

I can't do this headline any justice. Its beautiful in its own self. [Larry Brown Sports]

Naked rock climbing. Possibly NSFW? [Deuce of Davenport]

Bon Jovi took in no money from the 50,000+ in Central Park over the weekend. [SPORTSbyBROOKS]

Jason Peter (?) hates Lou Holtz. [With Leather]

John McCain Is Old Or A Liar

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate on the elderly that much. Sure, they're old, they don't understand new technology and they keep trying to give me that damn ribbon candy, but I gotta respect them for their contributions to this world. And even if those contributions are merely a bowl of Werther's Originals.

However, KDKA had a story, which I read on Deadspin, that said John McCain named members of the Steelers' defensive line when interrogated by the Viet-Cong as a P.O.W. Smart and cunning, throw out the first names you could think of, save your buddies' asses and confuse the shit out of the dirty foreigners trying to kill you and yours.

Be reminded that McCain was in Pittsburgh when he dropped that little information nugget. There's one problem. In his autobiography, McCain is quoted as saying he gave up another teams' names:


Pressed for more useful information, I gave the names of the Green Bay Packers' offensive line, and said they were members of my squadron.


That's from his 1999 book, Faith of My Fathers. Trying to win over the Steelers/Western PA vote, just like rival Barry Obama did a few weeks back?

ytownohio elaborates on Daily Kos about the KDKA story:


That's all well and good, but from 1967 to 1973 during McCain's imprisonment, the Steelers were just starting the process of assembling the great teams everyone remembers.

...

[The Packers claim] more sense since the Green Bay Packers of the '60s were nationally recognized. McCain's Steeler claim is at best false pandering and at worst a window into a easily confused 71-year-old man.


That makes a bit more sense. McCain has an event scheduled for Washington D.C. at the end of this month. If the story changes to him giving up Russ Grimm and the Hogs, we'll know something is fishy.

Mini Pony of the Day 7-11-08

Jeez...what in the hell is going on in this picture? It's...it's...unbelievable!

Is that a dalmatian? And the chick...

...Hey, baby General Patton.

Read these links, or drop and give me twenty:

Is Barack Obama speeding up the sale of the Steelers? [Hot Air]

An interview with Art Rooney Jr. [Mondesi's House]

I love you, EA. Just so you know. [Awful Announcing]

Sean Connery looks like me (not really) and Cotter's dad. [One For The Other Thumb]

Day baseball games. Yes or no? [Ladies...]

I bet the Pirates' M&Ms suck. [Black and Gold Tchotchkes]

Oh, yeah...free Slurpees today. [7-Eleven]